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Fool Me Once: A Mormon SortaBiography - Book One (Melody Joy's Personal Mystery 1) Kindle Edition

4.5 out of 5 stars 11 ratings

Meet Melody Joy, an ordinary Mormon wife, in an ordinary Mormon marriage. She is doing her best to juggle the responsibilities of being a wife and mother while attending law school and trying to build a career that will let her serve others while providing for her family. Melody’s church involvement is minimal these days, but she hasn’t given up her beliefs. She just can’t do everything at once. Her husband, Walter Bainbridge, is an ordinary Mormon man. He has worked for years to earn a Ph.D. and secure a university teaching position. His schooling has pulled him away from active church involvement and put a strain on his relationship with Melody, but they’ve both held on, waiting for the fast-approaching day when he would finally earn tenure and secure a permanent post in his profession. Enter Lacey: six feet of youthful strawberry blonde, long-legged, bored-with-her-own-husband mid-life-crisis distraction. Suddenly, the marriage vows Walter made to Melody two decades earlier go out the window, Melody goes a little (maybe a lot) ballistic over the treachery, and the Provence-Bainbridges are at an impasse: Walter wants to have his cake and eat it too, the church discourages divorce, Melody doesn’t want to do jail time, and she can’t afford a hit-man. What other options are left when your fairy-tale marriage is in serious trouble? This provocative memoir-style novel is part one of a three-part sorta-biography that reads much like *Educated* (Tara Westover) or *Escape* (Carolyn Jessup) or *Confessions of a Latter-day Virgin* (Nicole Hardy). *Fool Me Once* will pull you in, keep you turning the page, and leave you wondering how two such well-matched people could end up so far apart, how they will ever figure out their problems, and how they will manage to keep from killing each other in the process. A word from the author: If this story sounds familiar, that's because it is. This is the story of one Mormon couple’s married life before #MeToo. I write about Mormons because that's the culture I know best. MJ could have been a member of any church, anywhere. She just happens to be LDS. When I started writing these books, I had no idea the problem of bishops asking sexual questions in worthiness issues was as pervasive as it apparently is. All I knew is what I had experienced personally. Such interviews factor into the story here, and while MJ's experience was not as horrifying as that of many others, it still impacted her life in some significant and damaging ways. This practice needs to stop. No sexual questions, ever, for anyone. #protectLDSchildren ~MC
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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Malena Crockett is a recovering fairy tale princess: She believes the best heroines are those who work out their own happily-ever-afters. Like most humans, Crockett's characters can be naïve, vulnerable, and flawed, but they are more often strong, smart, and courageous, and have to rely on intuition and heart to work through the challenges and mysteries life presents. But isn't that what life is about? * Having lived for many years in both the Mormon corridor and the Bible belt, Malena now lives in the Pacific Northwest with her beloved human, canine, and feline family.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B015ZB1548
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Bumbershoot Press
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ September 29, 2015
  • Edition ‏ : ‎ 1st
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 558 KB
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 346 pages
  • Page Flip ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Book 1 of 2 ‏ : ‎ Melody Joy's Personal Mystery
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.5 out of 5 stars 11 ratings

About the author

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Malena Crockett
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So here's the official bio - you know, the one that goes at the end of books or on the back cover or in a program:

Malena Crockett continues to evolve, but at her core she is a story sharer: Her stories give voice to women of faith, Mormon women, both contemporary and historical; women whose existence, experiences, and contributions are often lost to time. Malena's characters can be naïve, fragile, stupid, or unimpressive, but they are more often strong, smart, courageous, and full of hope; they could be your neighbors, your colleagues, your kin. Their lives are similar to yours, yet in some ways they are very different.

Malena has survived extended sojourns in both the Mormon corridor and the Bible belt; she now lives in the beautiful Pacific Northwest where she shares her home with her beloved human, canine, and feline family.

If that didn't tell you everything you wanted to know, read on!

Greetings!

It's a strange thing, writing one's own bio. It feels like it might be similar to writing one's own epitaph, only without the black crepe. If you're reading this, it's because you're mildly curious about the person who wrote the book you just clicked on. Who is this author? Why did she write what she wrote? Do we have anything in common?

I'll start with the "why," and maybe the other answers will reveal themselves as we go along.

When I was a tiny child, I had Cinderella characters hanging on the wall in the bedroom I shared with my sisters. If you grew up in the 50s and 60s, you'll know what I'm talking about: those heavy cardboard cutouts with Disney animated movie characters on them. We had the princess, the glass slipper, the pumpkin/carriage, and a couple of mice, but no prince.

Of course I grew up thinking that the ultimate objective was to find that missing handsome prince and marry him, throw a big party with a white dress and a cake, and live happily ever after. The prince always remained faceless, but he was a very snappy dresser. That fantasy worked well in the super traditional mid-century Mormon community that raised me. I learned early on that my purpose in life was to grow up and marry an honorable, righteous Mormon returned missionary and raise a family in the church. That dream missionary was to be my prince, and he would show up when the time was right. My job was to be ready for him and wait around until he arrived.

Fast forward a few decades. Now I am a recovering fairy tale princess: I believe the most admirable heroines are those who work out their own happily-ever-after and actively pursue what they want and need instead of waiting for someone else to tell them. They find and follow a meaningful path instead of passively expecting a knight in shining armor or a dashing prince to come sweep them away to a life where their primary mandate is to preserve the family line. It’s not that I think marriage and kids are all bad; they just aren't *all*.

It should be no surprise then, that I invite readers to take a look inside the messy, complex and humorous lives of humans who are doing the best they can to live according to their beliefs while balancing real life and conflicting ideas in the mix; my characters live with a combination of fantasy and hope mixed with adventure and reality.

First up: Melody Joy Provence - the heroine from Fool Me Once. She and I are related by marriage in an alternate universe. Her story is not unlike the story of many female Mormon baby boomers. You may be able to relate to it yourself: MJ grew up in an LDS world where women were expected to be and do certain things, but just as she got to the "grown up" part of her life, everything changed, and the man she trusted to keep her heart safe turned out to be someone completely unexpected. If you've ever seen a train wreck in the making, you'll instinctively understand how this story plays out, and how wonderful it is when someone you love manages to walk away from the wreck, broken and with significant injuries, but empowered and ennobled. I can't tell you any more than this, because - well - Spoilers!

Melody Joy's SortaBiography is the inaugural trilogy launching a multi-generational saga, -Seven Generations Ascending-, a project that should keep me busy for a quarter-century or so. As soon as I finish Book Three (*Kiss Me One Last Time*), next up will be *The Pioneer Patriarch's Last Wife.* I'll post updates on my web site, www.MalenaCrockett.com (sign up for my newsletter and I'll ping you when I have news), and on my Facebook page, https://www.facebook.com/malenacrockett.author.storykeeper/. See you there!

Customer reviews

4.5 out of 5 stars
11 global ratings

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Top reviews from the United States

  • Reviewed in the United States on March 2, 2017
    This book was a wonderful easy read where one can dive right in Melody's life. You will experience laughter and tears while you go through ups and downs with Melody, her husband, her son Chris, and her two fur babies.

    You will get a bit of her Mormon history, and beliefs while she goes through the struggles of an up and down marriage. The love she feels for her whole family is evident with her decisions she makes while she goes through her wild adventures.

    Warning, this book may keep you up all night and you will be craving more. Enjoy!
    One person found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on November 15, 2015
    Not being one to read many novels, this book was a fun departure for me. I came across an old friend that recommended this book. Sharing much of the background and culture with the main protagonist, I was very interested to see how this story played out.
    MJ feels trapped by a culture that promoted marriage to the “right guy” and in the “right place” at the “right time”. Her attraction to Walter was real enough, but for some reason she was blind to the nature of Walter’s self-centeredness and even cruelty until the time of their marriage. The abuse and neglect that follows is both hard to read and so frustrating. MJ doesn’t try to justify her choices. In fact, the way the story read to me, she seems to wonder herself why she continues to forgive and try to make it “work” with Walter. In order to not spoil the plot, I will say that I wanted to move through this book quickly wondering how this was going to end.
    This book promises to be one of three novels moving from the present to the past and even the future. It makes me wonder how her life will turn out. There are many unresolved issues and challenges facing MJ and her only son, Christopher.
    An LDS reader may find himself recoiling at the criticism directed at the culture of the church. I viewed her story as one person’s authentic experience or interpretation of her life through the lens of her family, her church and her difficult and often unproductive choices. I am cheering for MJ in her future books.
    2 people found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on October 9, 2015
    If you know anything about growing up in a structured religious family, you know just what sort of frustration and turmoil this character is going through. There will be those that give a one-star simply because they believe the author is attacking the foundation of the church, so you should dismiss those reviews. This is a well established, knee-jerk reaction from those still under the LDS spell. This is a well written, descriptive story about one woman's struggle to break the bonds on the establishment and save herself and her child from a destructive relationship and start anew. Whatever it takes. Love this story!
    3 people found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on October 20, 2015
    The author clearly understands how difficult redefining your beliefs can be. I was totally engrossed in this book and had a hard time putting it down. I am eagerly awaiting the rest of this trilogy. Kudos to the author for hooking me!
    One person found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on October 23, 2015
    Bravo, lady! Thanks for the entertaining, educational, funny, frustrating, heart-breaking, suspenseful romp! Eagerly awaiting book 2.
    One person found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on March 4, 2016
    Rather than pity MJ--her fairy tail shattered by a cheating, lying, stupid husband, she is to be applauded for not wallowing in self-pity. We’re treated to her eloquent discourse as she reasons soundly with herself, and exhibits tremendous self-restraint while expressing clear terms of change for her husband.

    A masterfully written story that refuses to sink to bitter diatribe, yet skillfully balances considerations of child welfare, religious constraints, financial burdens, and care for a spouse who no longer deserves such compassion.

    An inspiration, and sometimes blueprint, for women who are dealing with a cheating spouse while trying to keep the household afloat as well as their own sanity intact.
    One person found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on November 16, 2016
    I was very disappointed with this book. It was to be mormon fiction at it was awful. There was swearing and detailed sex talk I stopped reading it after a while because it was horrible. Would not read another book from this author. She portrayed our religon so horrible. I have been a mormon all my life and never been taught what she portrayed.
  • Reviewed in the United States on October 22, 2015
    Excellent book and I can't wait for part 2 to be published
    One person found this helpful
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