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Kirsty Greenwood
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Jessica Beam is a Hot Mess: A very modern girl. Old school rules. Who'll come out on top? Kindle Edition

by Kirsty Greenwood (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
4.5 out of 5 stars 2,084 ratings
When down on her luck Jessica Beam is sold out by her best friend and thrown out of her home, the only person she can turn to is her long lost grandmother Matilda.

But life isn't so hot for Matilda either. The acclaimed etiquette books she wrote in her youth are no longer selling, her mortgage repayments are gigantic and now her disheveled granddaughter has turned up out of the blue, asking for help.

In an attempt to get a new book deal and make some much needed money, Jess and Matilda decide to band together and use Matilda's 1950s dating and etiquette guides to teach messy, unpolished Jess how to become the ultimate demure lady. The true test of their plan will be this: Jess must successfully capture the cold, cold heart of the very sexy and notoriously grumpy playboy Leo Frost and prove that Matilda's vintage guides can still work in the modern day. Just one tiny problem - Jess and Leo hate one another on sight.

It's going to be the ultimate makeover! Transforming Jess from trashy to tasteful will be no easy feat, and when surly Leo starts falling for Jess's secret identity, she discovers that what started out as a way to make some quick cash suddenly becomes a whole lot more complicated ...

♥ Author's Note: Enemies to lovers. Secret Identity. Fake dating. London in the summer. 1950s Nostalgia. So many laugh out loud, swoony moments. A refreshingly bold and hilarious heroine. A grumpy cad of red-headed hero. True friendships, true love and true joy. ♥

**THIS BOOK WAS PREVIOUSLY PUBLISHED UNDER THE TITLE THE VINTAGE GUIDE TO LOVE AND ROMANCE/LESSONS IN LOVE AND ROMANCE**
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  1. Print length
    372 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publication date
    August 2, 2018
  4. File size
    1.9 MB
  5. Page Flip
    Enabled
  6. Word Wise
    Enabled
  7. Enhanced typesetting
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Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B07G5JYKFX
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ (August 2, 2018)
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ August 2, 2018
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 1.9 MB
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 372 pages
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.5 out of 5 stars 2,084 ratings

About the author

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Kirsty Greenwood

Kirsty Greenwood

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Kirsty Greenwood is a bestselling author of funny, fearless and fast-paced romantic comedies about extraordinary love.

When she's not writing books she composes musicals and explores London where she lives with her husband.

Kirsty Instagrams at @kirsty_greenwood and can be found on Facebook at KirstyGreenwoodBooks. Say hi! She loves a natter.

Customer reviews

4.5 out of 5 stars
2,084 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book highly entertaining, with one review noting it had them laughing out loud multiple times. Moreover, the story receives positive feedback for its heartfelt moments, with one customer describing it as a perfect feel-good romantic tale. Additionally, the writing style is praised for being well-crafted and easy to read, while the characters are well-developed and relatable, with one customer particularly appreciating the relationship between the heroine and her grandmother. The book's authenticity and beauty are also highlighted, with customers describing it as cute and endearing.

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95 customers mention "Humor"95 positive0 negative

Customers find the book humorous, with multiple reviews noting it had them laughing out loud more than once.

"...I would recommend these books to anyone looking for a great summer read with some juicy love scenes. I didn't want this book to end." Read more

"...End of SPOILER But, as I said already, this is funny and a good escape read and it doesn't hurt that I got it on a free day...." Read more

"I had such a good time reading this book. The characters are so interesting. Jess was a great heroine. Her story made me want more." Read more

"...There are surprising twists and turns as Jess turns from a hot mess to a gorgeous debutant, with her proper granny’s advise and ends up falling hard..." Read more

40 customers mention "Heartwarming story"37 positive3 negative

Customers enjoy the heartfelt moments and emotional entertainment in this romantic story, with one customer noting how the characters grow emotionally and personally throughout the narrative.

"...these books to anyone looking for a great summer read with some juicy love scenes. I didn't want this book to end." Read more

"...And (2), there is some really great personal growth here by the end of the book...." Read more

"...The story is hilarious and so touching at the same time that I found myself laughing out loud...." Read more

"...This book had me laughing out loud and crying at some sections...." Read more

38 customers mention "Writing style"36 positive2 negative

Customers praise the writing style of the book, finding it well-crafted and easy to read, with one customer noting the author's down-to-earth approach.

"...That one is next! They are great romantic comedies that are very well-written in my opinion...." Read more

"This book has been laugh out loud funny. The writing style on this book is effortless and so fun to read...." Read more

"It's a great story! Jess is real and unpretentious, maybe too much so. When she tries to be classy and refined, she...well, she pulls it off...." Read more

"...Kirsty's writing style, characters and plots are unique and her books are relaxing and fun...." Read more

28 customers mention "Character development"25 positive3 negative

Customers appreciate the character development in the book, particularly noting the relatable heroine and believable villain, with one customer highlighting the engaging narrative voice and another mentioning the loving relationship between Jessica and her grandmother.

"...I love the character descriptions and the British slang - even if I have to look up some of the words...." Read more

"...I should add a (4): Greenwood has come up with some excellent characters, all with their own quirks and foibles and distinct personalities...." Read more

"I had such a good time reading this book. The characters are so interesting. Jess was a great heroine. Her story made me want more." Read more

"Fast paced and funny, quirky characters and unexpected twists. If you are looking for something both engaging and lighthearted, this book is it...." Read more

20 customers mention "Story quality"20 positive0 negative

Customers enjoy the story of the book, finding it interesting and wonderful, with one customer noting how it immerses readers in the narrative, while another describes it as a wonderful tapestry of crazy.

"...Anyway, it's a wonderful story. I loved it." Read more

"...If you are looking for something both engaging and lighthearted, this book is it. I laughed out loud many times" Read more

"...in all, this was everything you could want a romcom to be - funny, surprising, chock full of memorable characters and greatly entertaining. Kudos!" Read more

"...Thankfully, Jessica Beam is a Hot Mess is a wonderful story. It was fun to read and it pulled at my heart as well...." Read more

17 customers mention "Beauty"17 positive0 negative

Customers find the book beautiful, describing it as cute, endearing, and sweet, with one customer specifically praising Kirsten Greenwood's brilliance.

"...It also really brought out the feels. It was endearing and sweet. It is just something you must read. 5 stars!!!!!" Read more

"What can i say? The girl is BRILL!! I first found Kirsty’s Yours Truly book and i laughed my butt off!..." Read more

"Kirsten Greenwood is brilliant! She can spin a story that is utterly believable. I laughed out loud at the antics involved in this story...." Read more

"...Her characters are funny, sassy, giggly, adventurous, real and always optimistic...." Read more

9 customers mention "Authenticity"9 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the authenticity of the book, with one mentioning how the characters feel very real.

"It's a great story! Jess is real and unpretentious, maybe too much so. When she tries to be classy and refined, she...well, she pulls it off...." Read more

"...She wasn’t perfect by any means but she was believable - funny and genuine!..." Read more

"Hilarious and genuine. Truly a wonderful story...." Read more

"...story and I enjoyed it a lot it started sounding fake and end up feeling very real" Read more

My 2018 chick-lit author of the year
4 out of 5 stars
My 2018 chick-lit author of the year
I only discovered Kirsty Greenwood this year when I read 'Yours truly' - SO funny! and I immediately downloaded & read 'Big Sexy love'. I enjoyed these two books so much that I typed Kirsty’s name into the 'notes' section of my cell phone- the only author I have put in there this year. Then I waited for the next book. I was excited recently to find 'The Vintage Guide to Love & Romance' in the Kindle store and I bought it immediately. It took a little while to warm up to Jess's character in this latest book but she grew on me. Kirsty's writing style, characters and plots are unique and her books are relaxing and fun. If you enjoy Catherine Alliot or Sarah Kate Lynch books (as I do) you will love Kirsty Greenwood. There were a few typos but no doubt they'll get fixed overtime. Look forward to the next book!
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Top reviews from the United States

  • JJ
    5.0 out of 5 stars I'm hooked on Kirsty Greenwood books!
    Reviewed in the United States on September 19, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    I read one of her books after reading a great review in a magazine. I've now read all but one of her books. That one is next! They are great romantic comedies that are very well-written in my opinion. I love the character descriptions and the British slang - even if I have to look up some of the words.

    This story has some great twists and turns. The only thing I would have liked to see is Summer getting a little karmic payback. She was a very believable villain. Kirsty is my new favorite writer! I would recommend these books to anyone looking for a great summer read with some juicy love scenes. I didn't want this book to end.
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  • OLT
    4.0 out of 5 stars Funny story about a mess of a woman who finally tidies herself up.
    Reviewed in the United States on March 24, 2021
    Verified Purchase
    It's very, very true that the female lead of this rom com is a hot mess. She's out of control, drinks too much, sleeps around too much, is careless of the feelings of others, is unprofessional and unreliable in her work life, and I could go on and on and on describing her defects. I did not like her for at least half (or more) of the book. She's definitely not the kind of person you'd want for a friend and not even the kind of person you'd feel much Christian charity towards.

    So why on earth did I give this book four stars? (1) Well, reason one is that compared to all the other contemporary romances I've been reading, this one is a five-star book. And (2), there is some really great personal growth here by the end of the book. And (3), this had some very funny moments, some LOL, and snappy, fun dialogue. I should add a (4): Greenwood has come up with some excellent characters, all with their own quirks and foibles and distinct personalities.

    At the beginning of the story, Jessica and her "best" friend Summer (who's another unlikable human but in a different way altogether) have an influencer blog that's going places. They are even in talks with a publishing company about writing a book. At their blog, Summer is the influencer face and Jessica is the writer and ideas behind the face.

    So we will watch that whole deal and that friendship get sabotaged and see Jessica spiral even further down. With no money, no job, no friends, she decides to seek out the only living relative known to her: the grandmother she has never met, the estranged parent of Jessica's late mother.

    So I sat back and watched commitment-/relationship-phobic Jessica learn a few life lessons along the way to the happy ending of this story. As the daughter of an unhappy and troubled woman who raised Jessica alone and taught her not to trust in anyone, Jessica has a lot to learn about life and the need to help and be helped by others and how to form real friendships.

    I have one dissatisfaction with the story that kept it from being a 5-star romantic comedy. SPOILER: I did not appreciate Jessica's treatment of a super lovely man she met when connecting with her grandmother. He was a great guy and for much of the story I was hoping he would be the one she ended up with. Not that the hero of the book wasn't a good guy too but I felt bad for the other guy. End of SPOILER

    But, as I said already, this is funny and a good escape read and it doesn't hurt that I got it on a free day. I love a good bargain.

    I've read most of Greenwood's CRs. Some are better than others but all are more to my taste and are less superficial reads than many more popular contemporary romances I've tried.
    4 people found this helpful
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  • Miriam Larson
    5.0 out of 5 stars Delightful read!
    Reviewed in the United States on February 13, 2025
    Verified Purchase
    I had such a good time reading this book. The characters are so interesting. Jess was a great heroine. Her story made me want more.
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  • CW
    5.0 out of 5 stars This book made me laugh outliud
    Reviewed in the United States on September 28, 2021
    Verified Purchase
    This book has been laugh out loud funny. The writing style on this book is effortless and so fun to read. I adore British-line humor, especially when it involves a heroine who doesn’t know how funny she is. The main character, Jessica Beam, moves through life like it’s a big party until her best friend betrays her. Forced to find a new place to live and not having anyone to turn to, she decides to find her long lost granny. The story is hilarious and so touching at the same time that I found myself laughing out loud. Jess is like the best friend that I would want to have. There are surprising twists and turns as Jess turns from a hot mess to a gorgeous debutant, with her proper granny’s advise and ends up falling hard for a guy she believes to be a scoundrel. Her journey of falling in love is thoroughly entertaining as she tries to transform herself into a proper lady that seems to be in complete opposition to who she really is. This is the first book I’ve had any interest in reading since the COVID-19 pandemic began 19 months ago. Thank you for bringing some humor and lightness into my life Kirsty Greenwood. I so enjoyed reading this book.
    One person found this helpful
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  • Carole McKee
    5.0 out of 5 stars Awesome!
    Reviewed in the United States on September 15, 2023
    Verified Purchase
    It's a great story! Jess is real and unpretentious, maybe too much so. When she tries to be classy and refined, she...well, she pulls it off. When her so-called best friend throws her out and fires her at the same time, she's kind of in a pickle. By the way, I know Summer spilled her wine on Jess' jumpsuit on purpose. Anyway, it's a wonderful story. I loved it.
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  • ST
    4.0 out of 5 stars Surprisingly good
    Reviewed in the United States on July 6, 2021
    Verified Purchase
    I really liked this book. The author is very funny. Definitely not for sanctimonious twits but doubt they'll be missed. There are just a couple things that really irritated me. It has taken me the last three decades to resign myself to the fact that publishing (even the big guys) as some of us once knew it, is gone forever. I grin and bear it when I see errors galore, bad spelling and worse grammar and I understand that editors have no clue because they don't even know what they're supposed to be looking for and this book is not that bad but I still have triggers and one of them is "woah". The word is whoa and always has been. Sadly, woah will probably soon become a word because this is the age of celebrating and validating ignorance rather than encouraging learning. My other pet peeve is putting hair behind the ear. Seriously, even if everyone in the whole world actually did it all the time, WHO CARES??? Granted, it's not as bad as descriptions of people eating, but close. Finally, this book is really funny, well thought out and mostly well-written. I would read more from the author. Probably even if she doubles down and says whoa is "old school". That seems to be the latest term for people who actually have standards and know stuff. And are old which explains it all.
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  • Kindle Customer
    5.0 out of 5 stars Fun
    Reviewed in the United States on May 27, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    Fast paced and funny, quirky characters and unexpected twists. If you are looking for something both engaging and lighthearted, this book is it. I laughed out loud many times
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Top reviews from other countries

  • Asium
    5.0 out of 5 stars A five star book
    Reviewed in India on January 14, 2021
    Verified Purchase
    An emotional joyride. Loved it completely, lived it through. The emotions are not barely written but are felt in the exact amounts. A brilliant work by a brilliant writer.
    Report
  • Amazon Customer
    5.0 out of 5 stars Loved it !
    Reviewed in Canada on April 23, 2021
    Verified Purchase
    Funny, refreshing and entertaining. We can definitely relate to all of the characters. Also liked that there were not too many characters. The storyline was interesting and caught my attention from the get go. Thank you for writing such an interesting book.
    Report
  • Kaz M
    5.0 out of 5 stars Fabulous!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 29, 2025
    Verified Purchase
    Have read this book twice now and thoroughly enjoyed it each time. Really good storyline and fabulous ending. Would definitely recommend.
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  • Kika
    5.0 out of 5 stars Biased
    Reviewed in Brazil on September 24, 2020
    Verified Purchase
    The story itself is great, the plot, the writing style, the characters. However, the description of the movie says "a truly funny romantic comedy!" Most reviews also mention how incredibly funny it is and that lead me to believe I was going to read a real romantic COMEDY. Well, every romance has some sort of drama, but this one made me unbelievably sad. It ends well, but the painful self discovery journey made me cry buckets of tears so if you like drama, go for it! You'll probably love it.
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  • Kate R
    5.0 out of 5 stars Great book
    Reviewed in Australia on March 21, 2021
    Verified Purchase
    Really enjoyed it. Wasn’t cheesy. Part of it was hard to read as I found the decision to trick someone hard to endorse but that also made the book great. Satisfying but light.
    Report

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