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Tracie Podger
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Limp Dicks & Saggy Tits (Limp Dicks, Cold Nips, & Posh Frocks Book 1) Kindle Edition

by Tracie Podger (Author), Lisa Hobman (Editor) Format: Kindle Edition
4.4 out of 5 stars 232 ratings
What to do when your husband runs off and leaves you single—when being single is not your thing?

Lizzie has decided that single life does not suit her.

From castles in Scotland to barns in Kent, via apartments in London, she embarks on a journey of self-discovery as a single woman with all the humorous pitfalls along the way.

Naked artists, extreme earth lovers, taxidermy, and blow up dolls, are just some of the encounters Lizzie has to endure in her effort to get her life back on track.

With the dashing Scot, Ronan, by her side, will she ever be able to do that?

Or will his mountain of baggage just pile alongside hers creating an impenetrable wall between them?

A humorous journey of self-discovery and single life as a fifty-year-old.
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  1. Book 1 of 3
    Limp Dicks, Cold Nips, & Posh Frocks
  2. Print length
    612 pages
  3. Language
    English
  4. Publication date
    August 1, 2019
  5. File size
    2.4 MB
  6. Page Flip
    Enabled
  7. Word Wise
    Enabled
  8. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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Editorial Reviews

Review

'Okay, first of all, can we please take a minute and enjoy the brilliance of that darn book title? I love it because it takes the notion that that's all there is after a certain age and this love story is here to tell you, that that is absolute bulls***.

Shamefully this is only the second book that I've read featuring protagonists over the age of fifty, the second one I beta read a few weeks ago and it isn't even out yet. There are so few truly great love stories for women over a certain age, with most featuring heroines and heroes in their mid twenties to early thirties. However, Tracie Podger is set to rectify this terrible oversight by offering up one of the most comical, cringe-worthy (in the best possible way!), emotional and sweeping romances I've read in recent months. This book is hilarious, it's sweet and fun but still has so many great messages layered throughout, regarding acceptance and grief, both in death and through the loss of a relationship. It is blatant in showing us that life goes on, you can be on your own if you need to be, you can learn to love yourself all over again and learn to trust and fall in love all over again, age is not a restriction.
I've read Tracie before and loved her work but those love stories were more weighty, full of angst and heartache and redemption. With LDAST Tracie has opted to experiment not only with an older heroine and hero but also by adding a healthy dose of pure Britsh rom-com. It's outrageous at times, you will certainly cringe A LOT, you will also laugh and grin and get mad and swoon. Lizzie is so genuine and patient and kind, you can't help but cheer her on to find her happy ever after. Ronan was a little bit of an enigma, just when I thought I had him figured out (my pessimistic side showing) his character would prove me wrong and show us that in the end patience, understanding and love can see you through the worst of times. In fact Ronan turned out to be one of my favourite Tracie Podger heroes.

What made this story even better - chapter twenty five.' - Emerald Book Reviews

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B07VKCB5XF
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ August 1, 2019
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 2.4 MB
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 612 pages
  • Page numbers source ISBN ‏ : ‎ B086L6YRKY
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.4 out of 5 stars 232 ratings

About the author

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Tracie Podger

Tracie Podger

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Tracie Podger lives in Kent, UK with her husband and a rather obnoxious cat called George. She's a Scuba Diving Instructor with a passion for writing. Tracie has been fortunate to have dived some wonderful oceans of the world where she can indulge in another hobby, underwater photography. She like getting up close and personal with sharks.

Tracie writes under various pen names. Tracie Podger is reserved for her romance and sub-genres of romance as well as Women's Fiction. T J Podger is for her paranormal novellas, and under T J Stone, you'll find her thrillers.

If you would like to know more, please feel free to contact her, she would love to hear from you.

Newsletters are a great way for authors to keep in touch with readers. Tracie would like to invite you to join her mailing list and as a thank you, she's offering an ebook of her novella, Evelyn. Please feel free to copy this to your browser --> http://bit.ly/2mcCuoc

Twitter, @TRACIEPODGER

Facebook, Tracie Podger, Author

or via www.TraciePodger.com

Available in ebook, paperback, large print paperback and hardback. Some titles available in audiobook.

Tracie Podger:

Fallen Angel, Part 1

Fallen Angel, Part 2

Fallen Angel, Part 3

Fallen Angel, Part 4

Fallen Angel, Part 5

Fallen Angel, Part 6

Fallen Angel, Part 7

The Fallen Angel Boxset

Evelyn - to accompany the Fallen Angel Series

Robert - to accompany the Fallen Angel Series

Travis - to accompany the Fallen Angel Series

Rocco - to accompany the Fallen Angel Series

Taylor & Mack - to accompany the Fallen Angel series

Angelica - to accompany the Fallen Angel series

A Virtual Affair - also available in audio

The Facilitator - also available in audio

The Facilitator, part 2 - also available in audio

The Facilitator, part 3

The Freedom Diamond

Letters to Lincoln - also available in audio

Jackson

Limp Dicks & Saggy Tits - also available in audio

Cold Nips & Frosty Bits - also available in audio

Posh Frocks & Peacocks - also available in audio

My Lord

Finding Jacob, part 1

Finding Jacob, part 2

The Reunion

As T J Podger: Paranormal shorts

The Second Witch of North Berwick House

The Last Witch of North Berwick House

As T J Stone: Thrillers

Gabriel

A Deadly Sin

Harlot

In Italian:

Il Facilitatore

Il Facilitatore, Parte 2

IlFacilitatore, Parte 3

Un Amore Virtuale

Gabriel

Avventure e disavventure di una neodivorziata

Customer reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars
232 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book hysterically funny and appreciate its authenticity. The characters receive positive feedback, with customers describing them as heartwarming and wonderful.

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8 customers mention "Humor"8 positive0 negative

Customers find the book hilarious, describing it as "LAUGH OUT LOUD FUNNY."

"...This book is so funny that I usually had tears running down my cheeks. I especially loved Chapter 13... twerking??!! Oh my God! Hilarious...." Read more

"Loved the title! The characters were heartwarming Quick read, fun book, and wonderful heroine! Nice read!..." Read more

"...There was humor on so many levels and there was romance. When you add the stellar writing and character development it's a win, win, win." Read more

"Lizzie is perfectly flawed, hysterically funny and absolutely real! I related to her personally, emotionally, and mentally on so many levels!..." Read more

3 customers mention "Authenticity"3 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the authenticity of the book.

"Lizzie is perfectly flawed, hysterically funny and absolutely real! I related to her personally, emotionally, and mentally on so many levels!..." Read more

"While this story is laugh out loud funny, it's also very true...." Read more

"So Real and So Good..." Read more

3 customers mention "Character development"3 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the character development in the book, finding the characters heartwarming and the heroine wonderful.

"...The characters were heartwarming Quick read, fun book, and wonderful heroine! Nice read! Thank you 🙏🏽 ...." Read more

"...When you add the stellar writing and character development it's a win, win, win." Read more

"Lizzie was a character you could easily relate to. So funny. The story kept moving right along. I was sorry to have it end!!!" Read more

Top reviews from the United States

  • PJ Bur
    5.0 out of 5 stars Who knows where life brings you after Fifty??
    Reviewed in the United States on August 3, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    Wow - Tracie Podger has done it again with this book. Lizzie is newly divorced and negotiating her way through life after fifty. She is finding herself in this new world of dating and making new friends, and learning how strong and lovable she is along the way. This book is so funny that I usually had tears running down my cheeks. I especially loved Chapter 13... twerking??!! Oh my God! Hilarious. Please read it. You will enjoy the ride with Lizzie and the story is one that women can relate to. Oh Tracie - you are fantastic and love, love your books!!
    One person found this helpful
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  • TracyB
    4.0 out of 5 stars Loved the title! The characters were heartwarming Quick read, fun book, and wonderful heroine! Nice read! Thank you 🙏🏽 .
    Reviewed in the United States on November 25, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    Loved the title! The characters were heartwarming
    Quick read, fun book, and wonderful heroine!

    Nice read!

    Thank you 🙏🏽

    .
    Helpful
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  • Robin C
    5.0 out of 5 stars So Real and So Good
    Reviewed in the United States on September 13, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    This is my first book by this author, but will not be my last. I loved this book. It had all the things they make a book great for me. There was real life things like leaky bladders. There was some pain and drama like your lifelong relationship falling apart. There was humor on so many levels and there was romance. When you add the stellar writing and character development it's a win, win, win.
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  • robin
    3.0 out of 5 stars Amusing at times
    Reviewed in the United States on September 8, 2019
    Amusing at times, with a couple of scenes that did make me actually laugh. Could've done with a little more editing - too many commas that made for slightly stilted sentences. Despite being just a little older than Lizzie I struggled to connect with her, though that's probably because I am quite content being single while Lizzie is not. And I actually kept forgetting that Lizzie is fifty as much of the time she seems to think and act like she's a naive twenty-something. The men she meets leave something to be desired. But I suppose for someone our age who wants to be half of a couple it's a hard knock life finding a suitable other half.

    Note - received through Hidden Gems ARC program and voluntarily reviewed.
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  • Kez's Korner
    5.0 out of 5 stars LAUGH OUT LOUD FUNNY
    Reviewed in the United States on July 5, 2020
    Verified Purchase
    I am a huge fan of this author’s work…that is no surprise…but this was a new genre for her and I LOVE IT.

    The story is honest, brave and real. Lizzie and Ronan are great characters that will keep you hooked.

    This was also the first book to ever make me laugh out loud so be prepared for people asking what is so funny if you read this in public!

    I highly recommend this RomCom with a lot of heart. Trust me…it will make you smile.
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  • BookAddictStudio
    5.0 out of 5 stars What a great book about life, love and friendships after 50!
    Reviewed in the United States on August 13, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    Lizzie is perfectly flawed, hysterically funny and absolutely real! I related to her personally, emotionally, and mentally on so many levels! Ronan is a wonderful man with so many hurts and fears that I wondered if he would be the right one for Lizzie. What a great story and proof that even with age, saggy tits and limp dicks, there is someone for everyone!
    Helpful
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  • Tim & AJ Marks
    4.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious
    Reviewed in the United States on August 2, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    While this story is laugh out loud funny, it's also very true. Being single again and dating in this new technology is very confusing and challenging. The comedy of errors, the hilarious events are entertaining!
    One person found this helpful
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  • D. Moore
    5.0 out of 5 stars This was a funny book
    Reviewed in the United States on August 11, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    This was a great book with a lot of scenes that were laugh out loud and you could just imagine happening first hand. I admired Lizzie for knowing herself and what she was willing to accept.
    Helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

  • Amazon Customer
    5.0 out of 5 stars Very amusing!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 5, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    Great humorous book to read, different to Tracies other books but well worth a read, very funny from start to finish.
    Report
  • Pamela Taylor
    5.0 out of 5 stars Awesome
    Reviewed in Australia on August 26, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    What a fabulous, wonderful book, it has everything, terrific characters, I mean Ronan how sexy and gorgeous and Lizzie I haven’t laughed so much for such a long time even to the point of tears rolling down my face and laughing so loud my son had to check on me. I will definitely be checking the rest of Tracie’s books, I highly recommend this book.
    Report
  • Cheryl Riddell
    4.0 out of 5 stars Fabulous
    Reviewed in Australia on September 29, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    I bought this book for some lighter reading, I'm so glad I did. The book took you on a journey that left you laughing so often. The journey through Scotland was incredible, and to live in a castle! Sigh!. Please do yourself a favour and give this book a try, you won't be sorry!
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  • Julia B
    4.0 out of 5 stars Heartwarming and humorous
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on November 3, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    I was in the mood for a humorous, light hearted book and with a title like that, how could I not read it!

    There were moments of laugh out loud humour (Pat the Cat and where the title comes from are just two examples) but there was also an emotional heart warming story about two people with a lot of baggage coming to terms with the world of dating at the age of 50. I'm fast approaching that age and can totally sympathize with the fears, nerves and worries this would entail. I loved Lizzie, she was a kind, forgiving but no nonsense soul. Ronan blew hot and cold at times, but when you know his history you can hardly blame him. There were a host of fabulous characters, Lizzie's best friend was a riot!! Everyone needs a Joe.

    I loved how Tracie kept it real. Fifty year olds don't have the perfect, pert, flexible bodies and she wasnt afraid to mention the embarrassing bodily functions we all suffer from. They're also far from past it on the sexy times 😉

    Overall this book absolutely hit the mark and made me smile. Job done, thankyou Tracie Podger.
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  • Sarah T
    5.0 out of 5 stars Laugh out loud and brilliant!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on August 31, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    This was my first read by Tracie but definitely not the last. What a brilliant book! It was so funny at times that I was laughing out loud. It was such a great rom com, brilliantly written and had me completely sucked into Lizzie's world! I was rooting for her the whole time in the hope she found happiness. I was hooked to the story, it had some sadder parts in as well as the happy and funny. It was such a great read and was s complete breath of fresh air! I loved the end too, it was nice to read something more personal.
    I definitely recommend this book and will definitely be reading more Tracie Podger!
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