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Alice Winters
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The Mercenary's Guide to Mishaps and Romance (The Hitman's Guide Book 7) Kindle Edition

by Alice Winters (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
4.7 out of 5 stars 1,019 ratings

Ellis

Why is it that the first attractive man to look my way mistakes me for a bad guy, stuffs me in the trunk of his car, and ships me off to an island where I’m positive the only thing waiting for me is my own murder?

I mean... yeah, Tavish is charismatic and fun, but did I mention the whole trunk thing? Oh, maybe I forgot to mention his peculiar group of friends who keep promising to “help” me, but why are they running around with masks and weapons while praising fences?

Tavish and his friends are actually the bad guys, aren’t they?

If I (somehow) look past all of that… Tavish really does seem like a nice guy. He’s caring, funny, and willing to risk his life to protect me. It’s become quite clear that if I’m going to get out of this alive, I’m not going to be able to do it without him.

Tavish

So maybe I mixed things up a wee bit and took Ellis on a tiny road trip that he might not have been privy to. Ellis doesn’t seem to overly mind. I mean, yeah, maybe he tried blinding me with aerosol spray… or maybe I was just blinded by his handsome smile.

The problem is that Ellis is in danger, but he knows nothing about this world he’s been thrown into. He’s sweet, kind, and has the biggest heart of anyone I’ve ever met. And I’m prepared to protect it at all costs.

Contains a charming man who lays on a Scottish accent to get his way, a bewildered vet tech who’s wondering why everyone around him is so strange, a parrot who may or may not want to steal Tavish’s man, and the Hitman’s Guide crew up to their usual hijinks.

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  1. Book 7 of 7
    The Hitman's Guide
  2. Print length
    379 pages
  3. Language
    English
  4. Publication date
    October 3, 2024
  5. File size
    3.6 MB
  6. Page Flip
    Enabled
  7. Word Wise
    Enabled
  8. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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There are 7 books in this series.

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Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B0DHJGLRVP
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ October 3, 2024
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 3.6 MB
  • Simultaneous device usage ‏ : ‎ Unlimited
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 379 pages
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 out of 5 stars 1,019 ratings

About the author

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Alice Winters

Alice Winters

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Alice Winters started writing stories as soon as she was old enough to turn her ideas into written words. She loves writing a variety of things from romance and comedy to action. She also enjoys reading, horseback riding, and spending time with her pets.

Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
1,019 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book wildly entertaining and laugh out loud funny, with a wild plot that keeps them engaged. They love the series and appreciate the character development, with one customer noting the expert-level narration. They particularly enjoy the characters, with one customer specifically praising Alice's choice of narrator.

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18 customers mention "Humor"18 positive0 negative

Customers find the book hilarious, describing it as laugh-out-loud fun and wildly entertaining, with one customer particularly appreciating the interactions and banter between the characters.

"...been a few books in the last few years that have literally made me laugh out loud, and this one made me positively cackle in delight, repeatedly...." Read more

"This book was hilarious. I had no doubt this book would be great. Alice's brand of humor really makes for an excellent read for me...." Read more

"...I really enjoyed the interactions and the banter, but once again the mystery part of it was convoluted...." Read more

"So much fun. I love all the characters. This entire series has been phenomenal. Laughing never had so much confusion. Maybe pyjama boi will wake up." Read more

11 customers mention "Readability"11 positive0 negative

Customers find the book highly readable and consider it a must-read in the series.

"...Alice's brand of humor really makes for an excellent read for me. I just can't get enough of Leland, Jackson, Cassel, Jeremy, and the lot...." Read more

"So much fun. I love all the characters. This entire series has been phenomenal. Laughing never had so much confusion. Maybe pyjama boi will wake up." Read more

"I love these books so much! That was definitely one hell of a meet cute...." Read more

"...What did I just read ? It was a fever dream that's for sure. It was not bad but definitely not what I had anticipated...." Read more

8 customers mention "Character development"8 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the character development in the book, with one noting the expert-level narration and another highlighting the familiar faces they adore.

"...HAVE to start at the beginning because the author does an excellent job of introducing the characters that have had previous stories and while it’s..." Read more

"...Not so!! They actually both have a refreshingly unique voice. Ellis especially has a personality unlike anyone else in this series...." Read more

"So much fun. I love all the characters. This entire series has been phenomenal. Laughing never had so much confusion. Maybe pyjama boi will wake up." Read more

"...I have so much fun listening to these books. The narration is expert level and it brings the humour and this world to life...." Read more

6 customers mention "Elisabeth"6 positive0 negative

Customers love the character Ellis, describing him as nice and the best, with one customer noting his sexy appearance.

"...Ellis is so dang nice that he’s the first person to actually LIKE Leland without being even a tiny bit sarcastic by it...." Read more

"...I was hooked from page 1 and instantly adored Ellis...." Read more

"He is so nice. Unbelievably nice considering the way he interacted with Leland. Poor Ellis...." Read more

"...This book had me howling with laughter from the start. Ellis is a cutie pie, and Tavish is sexy af. I love them...." Read more

3 customers mention "Plot"3 positive0 negative

Customers enjoy the wild plot of the book, with one mentioning its intriguing mystery elements.

"...But it was also incredibly well-written and had a solid, wild plot that dragged me in from the first moment...." Read more

"...familiar faces we adore, the perfect amount of romance, and an intriguing mystery...." Read more

"This entire series is a delight. Great plotlines. Ridiculous scenes that are laugh out loud fun. I laughed until I cried...." Read more

Top reviews from the United States

  • Marty
    5.0 out of 5 stars hilariously entertaining. loved it!!
    Reviewed in the United States on March 9, 2025
    Verified Purchase
    There have been a few books in the last few years that have literally made me laugh out loud, and this one made me positively cackle in delight, repeatedly. It was hilarious, and wildly entertaining in the most flippant and irrelevant, ridiculous way. But it was also incredibly well-written and had a solid, wild plot that dragged me in from the first moment. I have only two regrets related to having read this book: 1. That it was on my TRB list for over a year before I got to it (I really regret that now that I’ve been so awesomely entertained by it!!) and 2. That I read this one first and didn’t start at the beginning of the series. You don’t HAVE to start at the beginning because the author does an excellent job of introducing the characters that have had previous stories and while it’s a wild mix of characters, it’s easy to figure everything out. I just wish I had started at the beginning… but I will be doing that now because I NEED to read about the first fence scene in real time!! Do yourself a favor and read this series. It’s great.
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  • Samantha T
    5.0 out of 5 stars Another perfect comedy
    Reviewed in the United States on October 6, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    This book was hilarious. I had no doubt this book would be great. Alice's brand of humor really makes for an excellent read for me. I just can't get enough of Leland, Jackson,  Cassel, Jeremy, and the lot. I adore Ellis. He might be a new favorite character for me. The way he was unerringly polite and no one knew what to make of it had me rolling with laughter. I also loved how absolutely clueless and funny Tavish was when speaking to Ellis. I couldn't help but think while reading this that I CANNOT wait for the audiobook. Michael is absolutely going to make this book 20 times better than it already is. I'm so happy and also so sad because I wish I could go back and read it for the first time again. 10/10 would recommend if you like a funny book. Also please be careful if you plan to eat or drink while reading this. You might choke on the hilarity.
    3 people found this helpful
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  • Jessica B.
    4.0 out of 5 stars Wow. Ellis is the best.
    Reviewed in the United States on October 11, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    I definitely never expected to like any characters more than Leland and Jackson, but I just absolutely adore Ellis. When reading Cassel and Jeremy’s book, one of the main complaints is that their voice is almost indistinguishable from Leland and Jackson. It’s just the way that Alice writes and so I kind of assumed again that Tavish would sound like Leland/Cassel and Ellis would sound like Jackson/Jeremy. Not so!! They actually both have a refreshingly unique voice. Ellis especially has a personality unlike anyone else in this series.

    We’ve seen plenty of nice and normal characters, but every last one of them is still confused, horrified, or annoyed by Leland. Ellis is so dang nice that he’s the first person to actually LIKE Leland without being even a tiny bit sarcastic by it. And by the end, Leland actually even speaks to Ellis like a normal Al, caring person instead of how odd he usually is when interacting with anyone.

    It’s so refreshing to see a character who isn’t remotely part of this world interact with all of our good “bad” guys. At the beginning they just have no idea what to do with him. I love that the gang is all here - except for Mason. Even Micah and Everly join in on the fun a few times.

    I really enjoyed the interactions and the banter, but once again the mystery part of it was convoluted. Like the previous book in the series, I just felt the case they were trying to solve was confusing and unbelievable. The only good mysteries in these books have been the ones having to do with Lucas and Leland’s past. Well, scratch that. The last book had that and I still didn’t like that mystery. Oh well. That’s not why we read these books, right? It’s to be entertained. And I felt like this installment was less repetitive since it focused on new characters it still familiar enough to fit right in with the rest of the series.
    3 people found this helpful
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  • ReddOne
    5.0 out of 5 stars Fits right in....the middle
    Reviewed in the United States on December 19, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    So much fun. I love all the characters. This entire series has been phenomenal. Laughing never had so much confusion. Maybe pyjama boi will wake up.
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  • Jessica Madden
    5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious
    Reviewed in the United States on January 23, 2025
    Verified Purchase
    Okay, so I started out reading this series and to be honest, I stopped because it got really OTT and not in a fun way. But then there was some sort of sale and the audiobooks were on there for this series so I jumped back in that way. And it was the best decision. I have so much fun listening to these books. The narration is expert level and it brings the humour and this world to life. And while I can acknowledge that this book isn’t perfect and is definitely silly, I had the best time listening to it. This series is made for audio and Alice picked the perfect narrator. That song at the end was perfection. I highly recommend listening to this and prepare for lots of laughs.
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  • JW
    5.0 out of 5 stars I thoroughly enjoyed The Mercenary's Guide to Mishaps & Romance
    Reviewed in the United States on November 1, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    Omg I couldn't love this more. This book had me howling with laughter from the start.
    Ellis is a cutie pie, and Tavish is sexy af. I love them. It was so fun listening to Michael Ferraiuolo read about the shenanigans they got up to with Leland and his crew.
    I loved the little additions at the end! That was awesome!
    I think there's a whole lot of genius between Alice Winters and Michael Ferraiuolo. I swear this entire series is a masterpiece.
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  • AnnElm
    5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious as usual
    Reviewed in the United States on March 1, 2025
    Verified Purchase
    I love when new characters gets added to the chaos Leland brings. Ellis is truly one of the most innocent ones and seeing him agreeing and care about Lelands shenanigans is just adorable.
    Travish and Ellis first meeting isn't the best one, but it did get Ellis a crash course in what's to come and Leland a d Jackson can finally be free of Travish flirting with Jackson now that he found Ellis.
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  • Lola C.
    4.0 out of 5 stars This is a trainwreck I couldn't stop looking at
    Reviewed in the United States on October 26, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    The title says it all. I am flabbergasted. What did I just read ? It was a fever dream that's for sure.
    It was not bad but definitely not what I had anticipated. I didn't understand half the things that were going on, I felt a bit like Ellis, hanging on for dear life, to a story that was a full speed trainwreck. But it was nicely written and intriguing enough for me to keep reading. I don't know if I want to recommend it or not, but this isn't your typical romance book.
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Top reviews from other countries

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  • tazmine
    5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 8, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    A brilliant book for a brilliant series.

    So funny, sweet and interesting as always. I don't know how Alice juggles so many characters but she did an amazing job at giving them all their own personalities and love seeing them all interact in group settings 🤣
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  • Gayle
    5.0 out of 5 stars Fantastic
    Reviewed in Australia on October 4, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    Poor Ellis! I spent the first part of this story feeling so sorry for him. He's so sweet & innocent. Tavish messed up, but spends the remainder making it right. With the hilarious, ridiculous & supremely superior help of Leland and the gang they help bring in the bad guys, find the answers to Ellis's questions and have a ridiculous amount of fun whilst doing it. Tavish finding love with Ellis adds another mismatched, but totally right for each other couple to this crazy family of Hitmen. This book is a fabulous addition to the Hitman series.
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  • dec (¬_¬) 📚
    5.0 out of 5 stars Bonne histoire
    Reviewed in France on October 10, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    Comme à chaque tome, c'est drôle, mème si les sujets abordés peuvent être difficiles.
    Ellis est inquiet et horrifié par tout ce qui se passe. Je finissais par croire que tout le monde trouvait l'univers des tueurs à gage normal. Enfin un personnage qui agit "normalement "
    J'ai ri à certains moments.
    J'attends l'histoire avec Everly.
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  • remus.grrrl
    5.0 out of 5 stars Always a pleasure!
    Reviewed in Canada on October 17, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    Another fabulous, funny book in my favourite series. Alice Winters keeps the laughs and the action running fast. I hope this cast of characters is around for a long time.
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  • Kindle Customer
    5.0 out of 5 stars Always the fun mayhem
    Reviewed in India on October 4, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    It's an absolute pleasure to read this series and relive the characters through story after story. The fun is always unlimited in Alice's books so you can laugh to your heart's content. It's a must read series, you can't not love Leland ❤
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