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Nearly Almost Somebody: Feel-good British fiction with Wicca magic and murder Kindle Edition
When newspaper scandals threaten his easy rural life, Patrick McBride needs to avoid trouble – and that means headlines waiting to happen like Libby Wilde. But Libby’s moved into the cottage of recently-deceased Maggie – the notorious local witch – and sadly for Patrick, uncovered Maggie’s spellbook. A little love spell can’t hurt, right?
A summoning spell, a missing pendant and a bottle of poisoned wine ensure Patrick can’t stay away from Libby, or the mystery of Maggie’s death.
Nearly Almost Somebody is contemporary British fiction — a Wattpad Number One and MOST READ title with 1,000,000 reads.
'Murder, love, cheating, poison and passion! This books lacks in nothing.' - Tay, ChicksThatRead.com
- LanguageEnglish
- Publication dateMarch 26, 2015
- File size3.0 MB
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Product details
- ASIN : B00V99HAKY
- Accessibility : Learn more
- Publication date : March 26, 2015
- Language : English
- File size : 3.0 MB
- Simultaneous device usage : Unlimited
- Screen Reader : Supported
- Enhanced typesetting : Enabled
- X-Ray : Enabled
- Word Wise : Enabled
- Print length : 424 pages
- Page Flip : Enabled
- Best Sellers Rank: #3,026,462 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- #12,477 in New Adult & College Romance (Books)
- #14,005 in Mystery Romance
- #27,926 in New Adult & College Romance (Kindle Store)
- Customer Reviews:
About the author

Caroline lives in the Lake District with her husband, small child and two Kune Kune pigs.
She daydreams of one day owning a pair of Louboutin's and having somewhere fabulous to wear them. Until then, she'll be found plodding up a mountain in her trusty hiking boots.
Caroline's novels #Forfeit and Nearly Almost Somebody are available on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback formats. Although they're standalone novels, they are both set in the same village so expect some familiar faces from #Forfeit to pop up in Nearly Almost Somebody.
Customer reviews
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To calculate the overall star rating and percentage breakdown by star, we don’t use a simple average. Instead, our system considers things like how recent a review is and if the reviewer bought the item on Amazon. It also analyzed reviews to verify trustworthiness.
Learn more how customers reviews work on AmazonCustomers say
Customers find this book to be a lighthearted detective story with great suspense and a satisfying ending. They describe it as an engaging, well-written read with wonderful humor, and one customer notes it's a perfect summer weekend read. The character development receives mixed reactions - while some find them well-developed, others mention they are flawed.
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Customers enjoy the lighthearted detective story with great suspense and mystery elements, with one customer noting a great twist at the end.
"...Along the way expect to find honest portrayals of young families, single men no longer interested in keeping score, the trials of start-up..." Read more
"...however, the book was an engaging (especially visually) novel, and perhaps my issues with it are because it's my first modern fiction u.k. read?..." Read more
"...I love every single detail about this story, from the Wicca to knowing each connection between the many characters and the seemingly innocent people..." Read more
"This was a mystery romance. Former ballet dancer left the business and was running from her former life...." Read more
Customers find the book engaging and brilliant, with one describing it as a perfect summer weekend read.
"...however, the book was an engaging (especially visually) novel, and perhaps my issues with it are because it's my first modern fiction u.k. read?..." Read more
"...There no flashy, evocative writing but, all in all, a good read." Read more
"...There are upscale restaurants, handsome bars, scenic fells, and a giant tangle of relationships that'll make you want to book a trip." Read more
"...A really good read, in the sea of "love stories" this is one that really stand out." Read more
Customers find the language of the book pleasant and well-written, with one customer noting it's good easy reading.
"Good easy reading for a lazy afternoon and evening...." Read more
"...Caroline Batten is a truly gifted author; the story is powerful and gripping while still retaining an element of juicy gossip that makes it all the..." Read more
"Too much British slanguage, too many characters, had a hard time keeping them all separate." Read more
"Love this author and her work - Batten produces wonderful humor, dialogue, storylines, suspense and most of all - she creates a world in which i..." Read more
Customers enjoy the book's humor.
"...immediately impress me with their depth, believable, portrayal, humor, and of course the inevitable "OMG he/she didn't, you dummy" moments..." Read more
"...It's got everything you can ask for, drama, romance, comedy, death..." Read more
"...Just a darn good story with lovable, yet flawed characters. I strongly recommend this book, along with her other one, which I loved just as much." Read more
"Love this author and her work - Batten produces wonderful humor, dialogue, storylines, suspense and most of all - she creates a world in which i..." Read more
Customers appreciate the development quality of the book.
"...Great! Loved it." Read more
"A really good story with very good developed and charming characters..." Read more
"Love this author and her work - Batten produces wonderful ......" Read more
Customers have mixed opinions about the character development in the book, with some finding them well developed while others note they are flawed.
"...The characters immediately impress me with their depth, believable, portrayal, humor, and of course the inevitable "OMG he/she didn't, you..." Read more
"...on connecting the reader to each character and painted each character-- in terms of personality, physical being, and emotional feelings-- very well...." Read more
"...The characters are flawed, yet engaging for all that...." Read more
"...Just a darn good story with lovable, yet flawed characters. I strongly recommend this book, along with her other one, which I loved just as much." Read more
Top reviews from the United States
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- Reviewed in the United States on June 1, 2015Format: KindleVerified Purchase"Chick Lit with Grit" said the introduction online. I was trawling WattPad looking to sort out the wheat from chaff. I didn't think I was going to find Clancy, W.E.B Griffin or Nelson DeMille on the free stacks, but who knew .... at least maybe this book wouldn't be staged in a middle school, written by an author who knew nothing else.
Pleasantly surprised I discovered, I chose my favorite authors above not for the military/spy action, but the well developed characters. Who knew?
Add Caroline Batten to my short list of favorite authors. And for those of you 1.5 million or so who read the free version on WattPad - THIS STORY IS DIFFERENT, and you need to re-read the published version, if for nothing else, the surprise ending.....
Ms. Batten presents an honest and well developed character study of a modern 21 century twenty something population of a small English town. The characters immediately impress me with their depth, believable, portrayal, humor, and of course the inevitable "OMG he/she didn't, you dummy" moments that cause us to shake our heads and smile, and wonder how they are going to get out of THIS ONE.
The story does every twenty-something credit - no negativity, whining, excessive video gaming, unresolved helplessness here. Ok, maybe a little wildness that carrys from University days, mixed in with having to get up in the morning and carry ou responsible jobs (teacher, veterinarian, ballet, rockstar painter) Get ready for deeply developed characters like a W.E.B. Griffin novel. Characters that make smart little remarks under their breath that would make DeMille smile, and there's even several Clancy-esque mysterious death, a car chase involving a helpless maiden, the theft of narcotics - ANIMAL narcotics... surrounded by the most honest portrayal of post university youth looking to make their way In the world despite their mistakes, realizing for the first time they have limitations they may be unwilling to accept, that I can ever remember reading.
Chick lit? Not from where I sit..... This American bloke(dude) flipped page after page, enchanted with fell (mountain) running, drunken football (soccer) games with spectators high fashion that ultimately devolves into the infinitely funnier antics of a fraternity intramural game.
Along the way expect to find honest portrayals of young families, single men no longer interested in keeping score, the trials of start-up businesses, spells, potions, several honest-to-god rock stars, actors, a world famous painter, a veterinary practice, and the aftermath of some wild parties - regrets? They have a few, but more than anything they accept their responsibilities and move their imperfect selves forward to a stunning conclusion you will not see coming.
To the 1.5 million wattpad readers who read Distraction, Nearly Almost Somebody is a different book, and will jerk you upright as soon as you assume you know what coming next.
Read this book! (Even if you THINK you already DID!).
- Reviewed in the United States on June 26, 2015Format: KindleVerified Purchasei am not sure if it's the culture or what, but i really don't like chick flicks and fluffy nonsensical romances. they disturb me because the characters are fickle and have no idea what real love is, and they perpetuate the idea that love is idolizing romance and nothing else. lost girls, bad boys, etc. it's silly. also, i would read and think that i'd accidentally skipped a page or something, but then realize that i was just struggling with the transitions. however, the book was an engaging (especially visually) novel, and perhaps my issues with it are because it's my first modern fiction u.k. read? maybe it is true to life, i don't know. if it is, that would make sense and also make me very sad. i wasn't expecting so much on sex scenes. nonetheless, the author did a great job on connecting the reader to each character and painted each character-- in terms of personality, physical being, and emotional feelings-- very well. i wouldn't call this a very profoundly written story, but i definitely enjoyed reading it.
- Reviewed in the United States on August 15, 2017Format: KindleVerified PurchaseI've read this story countless times while it was still on Wattpad and it's just as good if not better since being able to actually purchase and having been edited. I love every single detail about this story, from the Wicca to knowing each connection between the many characters and the seemingly innocent people being some of the baddest. I particularly love how in depth everything is. It's not too deep but not too short, particularly between the characters and their connections to eachother. I love how you know a pretty good amount of information about each one of the major and minor characters like Ed, Vanessa, the children, even Seamus Doyle. It all flows so perfectly and it's pretty much my favorite book. It's got everything you can ask for, drama, romance, comedy, death (I'm sure no one has the intentions of looking for death but hey it's there if you are) and like I said the detail leaves you feeling and seeing everything like you're right there with Libby and Zoe!
- Reviewed in the United States on June 13, 2015Format: KindleVerified PurchaseThis was a mystery romance. Former ballet dancer left the business and was running from her former life. Best friend/roommate inherited a mansion from her great aunt. They decided to move there and start over. The story was a good one. It took place in England so I had difficulty with some of he slang and local terms. Toward the end there were a few graphic sex scenes. There were a few places it seemed a paragraph or two were missing. I had to go back to see if I missed something. Great twist at the end.
- Reviewed in the United States on July 5, 2015Format: KindleVerified PurchaseThe book meanders around a bit for a few chapters, so that one wonders where exactly where it is heading. The characters are flawed, yet engaging for all that.
The crowd include a runaway ballerina and her friend, a real estate agent who knows that sex sells, a restauranteur who is able to maintain a stable for his daughters and his concert musician wife, a veterinarian who has been a bad-bad boy, and another couple who are mostly incidental to developments. They are privileged in a careless way but with the same problems of love, angst, confidence, and rebelliousness that seeming plague young people across classes.
Indecision, sleeping around, booze, weed, a bit of Wicca, and oh yes, a couple of dead bodies, don't stop the female protagonist from training for a major race.
There no flashy, evocative writing but, all in all, a good read.
Top reviews from other countries
- luceReviewed in Germany on March 27, 2015
5.0 out of 5 stars welcome back to Gosthwaite
Format: KindleVerified PurchaseAfter reading Caroline's debut novel #forfeit, I couldn't wait for this follow up. But don't be put off if you're coming straight to Nearly Almost Somebody, it works beautifully on its own.
The characters we met before allow the newcomers the limelight, as we get to know Libby, Zoe and Patrick; their tales intertwine, and right to the last chapter I was gripped.
Caroline has worked her magic again!
-
Paola B.Reviewed in Italy on July 12, 2015
2.0 out of 5 stars Si perde nel vento
Format: KindleVerified PurchaseIl libro inizia con un omicidio e il lettore appassionato del genere si mette comodo in attesa. Peccato che poi la storia vada avanti all'infinito con storie di sesso, bevute esagerate, pettegolezzi (troppi). Alla fine, ma solo alla fine, si torna al punto topico.
- Alison S. Parkins Book ReviewsReviewed in the United Kingdom on January 25, 2016
5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious mystery romance....
Format: KindleVerified PurchaseBook Excursions Book Reviews
5 Stars!!!
I was given this book in turn for an honest review!
When Libby decided to follow Zoe leaving the City for the Countryside; little did she expect to enter a world of scandal, drama and mystery! Wasn't the countryside supposed to be peaceful? Not for Libby...
In all honesty I truly had no clue, what to expect with this book; what I got completely shocked me! Caroline Batten has written a hilarious romance novel with drama, sex, mystery and suspense. The story at first was slow paced and detailed, which as the story progressed all made sense. Around 15% into the story, it really got going and I was soon hooked!
The characters are a mixed bunch with their own idea of what's moral and what's not; although at the same time they always had each other’s back in a bizarre twisted way.
I loved Libby, although she made mistakes and huge ones at that, she was always honest and up front, she was also a very private person, she wasn't one to tell the world her business.
I wanted to hate Robbie but I couldn't find it in myself to do so. He was just too kind and irresistible even when he in my opinion let Libby take too much of the blame.
Now Patrick was a bad boy, a sexy, irresistible man. Again I should have disliked him, however deep down he had a kind heart full of love; he was just too caring and sweet to resist.
Zoe both infuriated me and left me with a heart of sadness. Her character was intriguing and the more you learnt of her past the more you saw how little love and care she had ever known or understood and her actions and demeanour made a lot more sense.
Other characters to this story each had their own little quirks and twists, some I loved and some I wanted to slap. What they all did for me for sure was have me in hysterics more than once.
This story is a whirlwind adventure that had me captivated and intrigued, I didn't want to put it down. This story is long and worth every minute which again surprised me, Caroline Batten is a very talented writer.
If you love woman literature with romance, suspense, humour, drama and a whole load of mystery thrown in, without a doubt you will love Nearly Almost Somebody by Caroline Batten.
- Night OwlReviewed in Australia on May 29, 2015
5.0 out of 5 stars Thoroughly entertaining read with lots of laughs!
Format: KindleVerified PurchaseAfter reading the Authors debut book #Forfeit and being drawn into the lives of the quirky characters who live in the lakes district village of Gosthwaite and all of the hilarious banter and off beat adventures surrounding them, I was left wanting more...and this book definitely delivers!
In this book we see a lot more development of the characters we first met along with a couple of new comers to the village, and a lot more hilarity with all the sub stories all this group of friends as their lives entangle together in off beat adventures and mischief all with a bit of white magic and mystery to tie it together.
I am very impressed with this Authors ability to bring to life a story that is filled with loads of out loud laughs, lots of side stories, beautifully described settings and characters all woven together in a story that has the reader held captive to the last page! ....think Bridget Jones with a lot more alcohol and recreational drugs mixed with some sketchy white magic and who done it mystery.
I am left wanting more and really hope to see more adventures from Gosthwaite soon!
Best of all.....this book as well as her first one (#Forfeit) is complete without the dreaded cliffhanger ending that has sadly become all too popular these days!!!
Caroline Batten is now on my watch list of Authors whose books I eagerly look forward to!
A truly fun read.....and I would recommend this book to anyone.
- JenSlevReviewed in Australia on June 13, 2015
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing read
Format: KindleVerified PurchaseMagic, murder, and love. Moving to a small town may be the getaway wanted for Libby and Zoe, but it doesn't take long for the drama to begin. Affairs, a nuder to solve, a little bit of magic, love and drama, this was a lovely long read, that has me wanting more!