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Alice Winters
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The Hitman's Guide to Making Friends and Finding Love Kindle Edition

by Alice Winters (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
4.5 out of 5 stars 4,114 ratings
What happens when a snarky hitman and a by-the-book PI cross paths?
Leland
Being a hitman has its perks, but I never thought getting an accidental mooning by an attractive PI while he’s caught on a fence would be one of them. While it’s not exactly love at first sight, he’s captured my interest and won’t let go.

Suddenly, I find myself caught in a game of cat and mouse, determined to attract the attention of Jackson, the PI who should be my enemy. He pretends like he’s not flattered by my flowers and the mentions of my totally-not-fictitious blow-up doll Randy (or was it Dandy?), but I know better. Why else would he be teaming up with me to bring down Hardek, one of the city’s most ruthless criminals?

Jackson
Even though the cops are telling me that the hitman is a notorious contract killer, I can’t help but admit that I’m drawn to him. He’s funny, charismatic, and attractive. There’s no way this ridiculous man can be the person the cops are after. But when Leland ends up at my doorstep injured, I’m faced with a tough choice. It’s my duty to hand him over to law enforcement, but my heart has other plans. I want to keep him. To protect him. To be with him.

Though one question remains: why in the world does the man have so many d*mn guns?

Contains: shenanigans on a swing that you would NOT find at a playground, a car chase that sadly doesn't have flips or explosions, a horsey ride sans horse, cuddles, an exuberant mutt, a suspicious chief of police, and lots and lots of laughs.
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  1. Book 1 of 7
    The Hitman's Guide
  2. Print length
    380 pages
  3. Language
    English
  4. Publication date
    July 30, 2019
  5. File size
    3.0 MB
  6. Page Flip
    Enabled
  7. Word Wise
    Enabled
  8. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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  1. “Leland, you’re funny—you make me laugh every day. You’re nice and caring, even if you act like you’re not. There’s a lot more to you than a pretty face. I could put a bag over your head and still like you. I might even like you better.”
    Highlighted by 277 Kindle readers
  2. “That’s because I’m so awesome that it took God even longer to finish creating me. Perfection takes a long time to create.”
    Highlighted by 267 Kindle readers
  3. “I will gladly give you all of that as long as you stay beside me.” “I won’t run away again.” “You can’t leave me.” “I won’t.” And I will do everything I can to make sure that stays true.
    Highlighted by 263 Kindle readers
  4. I’m going to starve to death out of pure laziness. Sounds about right.
    Highlighted by 161 Kindle readers
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Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B07VBWFSFX
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ July 30, 2019
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 3.0 MB
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 380 pages
  • Page Flip ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Book 1 of 7 ‏ : ‎ The Hitman's Guide
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.5 out of 5 stars 4,114 ratings

About the author

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Alice Winters

Alice Winters

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Alice Winters started writing stories as soon as she was old enough to turn her ideas into written words. She loves writing a variety of things from romance and comedy to action. She also enjoys reading, horseback riding, and spending time with her pets.

Customer reviews

4.5 out of 5 stars
4,114 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book hilarious and entertaining, with a fast-paced plot filled with mystery. The characters are well-developed, with customers particularly enjoying the dynamic between Leland and Jackson, and the writing is praised for keeping readers engaged in the action. Customers describe the book as charming and sweet, with one review highlighting the excellent dialogue between the main characters.

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197 customers mention "Humor"186 positive11 negative

Customers find the book hilarious and entertaining, with several mentioning they were dying laughing while reading it.

"...I love all the dialogue and snarkiness. It has been a fun story with some good action. I highly recommend this book...." Read more

"...He's like a puppy with ADHD and I love him. This book is wicked funny, had me actually laughing out loud. I appreciated it...." Read more

"...Winters has created a wonderful romantic action novel that will make you laugh out loud...." Read more

"...the book from being sappy, and turns it into something that is pure delight. And then there’s the mystery they’ve been trying to solve...." Read more

111 customers mention "Plot"104 positive7 negative

Customers enjoy the plot of the book, finding it engaging and fun with elements of mystery.

"...It has been a fun story with some good action. I highly recommend this book. It deserves to be on every ones book shelf." Read more

"Once again, Ms. Winters has created a wonderful romantic action novel that will make you laugh out loud...." Read more

"...There's a lot of action, a lot of hilarity (couldn't help but laugh out loud at times), as well as a lot of feels in this story...." Read more

"...I enjoyed the overall mystery and drama plots but the end felt rushed and not very thought out...." Read more

77 customers mention "Character development"73 positive4 negative

Customers enjoy the characters in the book, finding them wonderful and hilarious, particularly appreciating the fun interactions between the main characters.

"...Alice Winters write the perfect combination of characters. They play off of each other in ways that keep me riveted to the page...." Read more

"...The characters are wonderful, and the writing style is smooth and flows nicely...." Read more

"...They are the perfect comedian and straight man duo—the ying to the other’s yang...." Read more

"...Most of the characters are fleshed out well and contribute to the story. This is my favorite of the series Alice Winters has put out...." Read more

57 customers mention "Sweetness"57 positive0 negative

Customers find the book charming and sweet, describing it as sexy and filled with great love.

"...I appreciated it. It's somehow light and really sweet, even though there's like a lot of crime and violence." Read more

"...Honestly, when these two finally get together, they are almost sickeningly adorable—thank goodness for all of the snarky, inappropriate humor!..." Read more

"That was fun! Love these two! Jackson is a PI and Leland a hitman. The two should not work but Leland decided they do and that’s that...." Read more

"...He manages to be charming instead of annoying and he keeps Jackson on his toes...." Read more

33 customers mention "Writing quality"25 positive8 negative

Customers praise the writing quality of the book, with its engaging dialogue and Michael Ferraiuolo's great narration, making it an easy read.

"...I love all the dialogue and snarkiness. It has been a fun story with some good action. I highly recommend this book...." Read more

"...The characters are wonderful, and the writing style is smooth and flows nicely...." Read more

"...It was an easy read that made the shooting and maiming of bad guys very entertaining...." Read more

"...the overall mystery and drama plots but the end felt rushed and not very thought out...." Read more

26 customers mention "Chemistry between leland and jason"23 positive3 negative

Customers enjoy the chemistry between Leland and Jackson, finding them delightful characters, with one customer particularly noting how Jackson's patience complements their relationship.

"Leland is the greatest thing. He's like a puppy with ADHD and I love him. This book is wicked funny, had me actually laughing out loud...." Read more

"...I absolutely love Leland and Jackson. Their banter is sweet and funny. So many things that Leland says come completely out of left field...." Read more

"...spill out of his mouth were pure slapstick gold, and Jackson's reactions were his perfect foile...." Read more

"...It went so well with Jackson's distrust and overall grumpiness...." Read more

13 customers mention "Pacing"13 positive0 negative

Customers enjoy the book's pacing, finding it fast-paced with non-stop action, and one customer notes there are no snags or slowdowns.

"...The banter between Leland and Jackson is fast-paced and funny, drawing the reader in to see just what type of inanity will fly out of Leland's..." Read more

"...The snark level was off the charts and I loved it. Fast paced but detail -oriented. I highly recommend it." Read more

"...He was so spot in with his voices and cadence it was fantastic!..." Read more

"...I love his character voices, pacing, and how well the narration suits the story...." Read more

12 customers mention "Violence level"9 positive3 negative

Customers appreciate the book's approach to violence, describing it as deadly yet not taken too seriously, with one customer noting its strong moral compass.

"...things and things blowing up, Leland actually has a pretty strong moral compass...." Read more

"Great characters with just the right mix of seriousness and absurdity. No cheating, just a hilarious ride." Read more

"...somehow light and really sweet, even though there's like a lot of crime and violence." Read more

"...Leland’s crazy antics had me laughing so hard. The story has mystery, danger, excitement, sweetness and laughter...." Read more

OMG What an amazing Book
5 out of 5 stars
OMG What an amazing Book
OMG this book has you laughing from page one onwards. Leland is a hitman known as “The Sandman” and his quick wit is infectious he manages to come up with some amazing quotes that have you in stitches. Jackson is a private investigator and he falls victim to The Sandman's practical jokes and as time passes they form a connection like no other. Alice ha hit it out of the park with this one and I highly and strongly recommend book you will not be disappointed.
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Top reviews from the United States

  • Zaftig Reads
    5.0 out of 5 stars I found my soul mate
    Reviewed in the United States on January 5, 2025
    Verified Purchase
    Within the first page it became apparent that Leland was my soul mate. OMG I can not tell you how much I love this character! He is completely insane and I can not get enough. His love for his Jackson boarders on torture and I am THERE for it! Jackson is an obvious masochist since he eventually gives in to Lelands verbal abuse and allows himself to fall in love with this crazy hitman.

    This book was an amazing work of art. The crazy male lead and his grumpy love interest is my favorite type of read. Leland is surprisingly good at being a hitman and Jackson is good at being the man he needs. The story is full of snark, adventure, and two men falling in love (or at least one man convincing the other they are meant to be while torturing him in embarrassing ways).

    Alice Winters write the perfect combination of characters. They play off of each other in ways that keep me riveted to the page. I love all the dialogue and snarkiness. It has been a fun story with some good action. I highly recommend this book. It deserves to be on every ones book shelf.
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  • Madeline Q.
    4.0 out of 5 stars I'm in love
    Reviewed in the United States on February 2, 2025
    Verified Purchase
    Leland is the greatest thing. He's like a puppy with ADHD and I love him. This book is wicked funny, had me actually laughing out loud. I appreciated it. It's somehow light and really sweet, even though there's like a lot of crime and violence.
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  • Meg
    5.0 out of 5 stars A rom-com action at its finest
    Reviewed in the United States on September 21, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    Once again, Ms. Winters has created a wonderful romantic action novel that will make you laugh out loud. The characters are wonderful, and the writing style is smooth and flows nicely.

    Jackson is ex-military and a P.I. He has a special relationship with the chief of police, Henry, who shares inside information on cases on a regular basis. He's never been in a relationship, and his family doesn't truly accept him for who he is...or at least his evil mom doesn't.

    Leland had it rough growing up. When he ran away from his last foster home, he found himself in a bad situation, but a man stepped in to help make it all better. Unfortunately, he was a manipulative man wanting an apprentice to train, so Leland became his pawn. It wasn't until Leland learned a hard lesson that he decided to put an end to the destructive relationship. However, he decided to put the skills he had been taught to rid the world of evil, one bad guy at a time.

    When a shared case brings the two men in contact, things get interesting fast. Leland is loud and obnoxiously flirty, while Jackson is full of sarcasm, dry humor, and an extreme desire to not fall for this hitman's whacky ways. Against his better judgment, Jackson decides to give Leland a chance when he is hurt. The rule is simple: don't hurt or kill anyone anymore, and Leland can stay with Jackson while he heals.

    During this time, Jackson begins to trust Leland, but Leland has to get out of the house. He's broken their agreement, and he does a bad/good thing. When he realizes that he misses Jackson, he convinces him to give him another chance. Only this time, it's Jackson who asks Leland to break his promise. Things get exciting from there.

    Family drama, more sitting around the house for Leland, and a relationship that is growing, all lead to a really big screwup on Leland's part. Eventually, knowing it could cost him everything, he comes clean. At this point, Jackson has already learned the type of person Leland is, but Henry is another matter altogether. Especially with his history with Leland, and now his current situation.

    However, when the case has a new breakthrough, Henry brings the two men in as consultants, and everything takes off again. When Leland realizes who their latest lead is, he allows himself to play the victim, knowing Jackson and Henry will come through and catch their quarry.

    With witty and outrageous banter throughout the story, there is never a dull moment. The romance does not take away from the plot of this action story, but it is touching in its own warped kind of way. And, lo and behold, Leland, with his crazy ideas, has to adopt the most energetic dog at the pound! This book just reinforces my author crush. Lol!

    Happy reading!
    4 people found this helpful
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  • Amanda Brooks
    5.0 out of 5 stars One of the funniest books I've read in a long time!
    Reviewed in the United States on August 12, 2023
    Verified Purchase
    Summary: Leland is a hitman. Jackson is a PI with close ties to the police chief. When they cross paths while staking out the same house, Leland decides to mess with Jackson. But what starts out as a bit of fun for Leland, and something worrying to Jackson, soon becomes more complex as they start to actually like each other. When Leland ends up injured on Jackson’s front lawn, Jackson can’t help but protect him rather than turn him in.

    ‘“We didn’t make up because I haven’t forgiven you yet.” The look on Leland’s face tells me that he thinks otherwise.
    “I have been forgiven. The moment you saw my face, you forgave me.”
    I might have. “No, I didn’t.”
    “Just admit it. Your heart beats just for me.”’

    ‘“Is he always like this?” Henry asks.
    “Unless he has a gun in his hand, his brain doesn’t work right.”’

    Review: If you love mm romance books that make you laugh you must read this book. It is hilarious. I not only laughed out loud throughout, I also made my family listen to passages that made laugh especially hard. So good!

    Leland’s mind goes a hundred miles an hour and he can’t sit still unless focused on a job. He’s got a warped sense of humor and almost zero filter unless he thinks it’s truly important to have one. And Jackson loves it—even if he pretends not to. They are the perfect comedian and straight man duo—the ying to the other’s yang. Leland makes Jackson smile and laugh every time they are together, and that is something Jackson needs in his life. As an ex-military guy who hid his sexuality until he was in his 30s, he hasn’t been able to just be happy or had much reason to be. Until Leland. And as a man with a rough upbringing through the foster care system that ended with him running away and ultimately in the care of a hitman looking for a protégé, he hasn’t had much experience with friendship or love. Being with Jackson, having someone who cares about him is everything. Honestly, when these two finally get together, they are almost sickeningly adorable—thank goodness for all of the snarky, inappropriate humor! Definitely saves the book from being sappy, and turns it into something that is pure delight.

    And then there’s the mystery they’ve been trying to solve. Nice twist I was not expecting. Well done!
    2 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

  • Kindle Customer
    5.0 out of 5 stars Funny, exciting and fast paced.
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on January 22, 2025
    Verified Purchase
    Loved it. Downloading the next book immediately.

    I've loved everything from this author but I think these two are my new favourites
    Report
  • KMS
    5.0 out of 5 stars What if the Hitman is not the typical Hitman?
    Reviewed in Germany on August 21, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    I enjoyed reading Jacksons and Lelands story quite a bit. Jeez, Leland is batsh#t crazy! But that's what makes the developing relationship between the PI and the Hitman interesting. Both discover that there is not only more to each other but also to their future. Although the book is quite long there are enough good scenes to enjoy the unusual quirks of the Hitman.
    Report
  • CJ
    5.0 out of 5 stars OMG BEST BOOK EVER 😂😂😂😂😂
    Reviewed in Australia on September 26, 2020
    Verified Purchase
    Please read. Alice is an amazing Author, never laughed so much in my life, took hours to read 13 pages just laughed sooo much. Fantastic, funny, exciting just loved it. Jackson and Leland are just incredible, loving, hot and so in love. Other characters are fantastic also.
    I have never been read books that continue into a series but so looking to reading more just hoping they are just as funny.
    Really if you read nothing else read this book. EXCELLENT FUNNY OH SO FUNNY.
    Report
  • Silvana
    5.0 out of 5 stars Different but great!
    Reviewed in Spain on June 18, 2023
    Verified Purchase
    This is not your typical romance book. But honestly, I loved it. I particularly fell in love with Leland because who wouldn't?! His shenanigans are to die for 🤭❤️. A wonderful character!!! And the relationship with Jackson is awesome too.
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  • K.H.
    5.0 out of 5 stars Not quite a meet cute
    Reviewed in Canada on May 19, 2022
    Verified Purchase
    A crazy fun surprisingly deep wild ride of a romance!

    Jackson is a PI and he finds himself noticed by an assassin. This would normally be bad, and seems so at first since this assassin is credited with killing the police chief's partner. But said assassin Leland is far more interested in Jackson himself and has no contract out, leading to the two intersecting at work. When things go a bit wild it pushes the two even further together and a relationship unexpectedly develops.

    Leland is just an absolutely crazy and adorable character. He has a slightly funky moral compass from a really poor upbringing (assassin after all) and sees the world in a bit of a different way. At the same time he is bright, bubbly, energetic, loyal, and quite a lot of fun. Picturing him as an assassin is just a bit wonky while at the same time seeming so right. When he starts poking into Jackson's world it makes even more sense.

    Jackson is a PI so he isn't perfectly straight laced. No stranger to doing things slightly adjacent to the law to get things done, he still has a very strong moral compass and does not agree with killing. When he meets Leland everything gets thrown into the air as he finds he cannot bring himself to want to turn in this unusual assassin. It is a decision that truly changes his life.

    There is lots of fun and action in this book but there was also some really deep and emotional times. Learning about Leland's past wasn't cool or cute, but a show of the manipulation it would take to create the man he is. Seeing how Leland got away from that was difficult, but seeing how it made him as an adult was even harder. The decisions that Jackson and Leland make for each other go into the gray at times but are meant to bring about the best possible result. It was a wild ride and promises more of the same in the future!
    Report

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