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The Vampiress With Amnesia Paperback – May 2, 2016

4.7 out of 5 stars 4 ratings

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The Vampiress With Amnesia South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan and Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing are in an abandoned lighthouse on the ocean in the midst of a raging rainstorm and angry waves. There on this windswept night, they encounter a vampiress. But no ordinary vampiress. A vampiress with amnesia. A vampiress who doesn't know who she is or how she became a vampiress. Dracul and Hyung agree to spare the vampiress' life until she can discover who she is. Dracul will spare her life... well... because... he usually spares the life of beautiful vampiresses. And Hyung will spare her life because she wants to know where the vampiress bought her spiked stiletto high-heeled shoes (Hyung wants a pair for herself) but since the vampiress has amnesia, she can't remember. So Hyung will let her live until she remembers where it was that she bought her stilettos... and then... it will be... bye-bye vampiress! A vast array of interesting characters populate the world of this novel besides Hyung, Dracul and the vampiress with amnesia. There's Set the London-based billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire who's reduced to being a mere multi-millionaire ancient Egyptian vampire. The novel is set in the time period between April 2009 and July 2010 and Set's fortunes have been severely impacted and downsized by the world economic meltdown of the autumn of 2008. So Set sends two of his employees the shapeshifting hamster/human Chief of Security and Intelligence Gathering for Set Enterprises Mr. Renfield R. Renfield and his genetically cloned personal concert pianist Amadeus Emanon on a global world wide mission to make him a BILLIONAIRE vampire again as opposed to a mere multi-millionaire. Also involved in the melee of events are the Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec, South African witch doctor Sterling Makabo and the Welsh vampiress Morgana (niece of the Welsh enchantress and sorceress Morgan le Fay who battled King Arthur) who wishes to sign a major recording contract with London music and recording studio executive Heathcliff Dionysus Campbell. Current events from the time period of April 2009 to July 2010 serve as backdrop to the novel from Kanye West making a jack ass of himself over Beyonce having one of the best videos ever to the final tournament of the 2010 FIFA World Cup Championships in South Africa that sees Paul the Psychic Octopus at his Sea Life Center zoo in Germany getting death threats over the predictions he's making for tournament results. Will Set become a billionaire vampire again? Will Heathcliff Dionysus Campbell continue to feed his pet Siamese cat Oysterella oysters and vodka that she seems to love? Will the vampiress with amnesia regain her memory? Will Hyung discover where the said vampiress bought her spiked stiletto high-heeled shoes? This is a vampire novel like no other in recorded history.
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Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform (May 2, 2016)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 208 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1533056366
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1533056368
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 1.1 pounds
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 8.5 x 0.47 x 11 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 out of 5 stars 4 ratings

About the author

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Christopher Milner
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Christopher Milner, journalist, reporter, columnist, geopolitical analyst turned blogger now author.

Blog: https://draculvanhelsing.wordpress.com

Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
4 global ratings

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5 out of 5 stars
give this a try before saying nay
This easy to read but unique book had do silly things like laughing out-loud, suddenly saying “huh?” beside my husband who would in turn be shaking his head like there’s no helping me, but hey, that’s just the kind of book this is. A fun read with lovable bad guys and good guys that who can keep up with being bad with the villains. Characters are easy to tell apart by their way of speech alone. The downside for me is the knowledge that the book is actually a mixed between fiction and real life event. I’m someone who barely pay attention to news or anything happening around the world unless it’s important for my life, so I started speculating which is real and what is not while reading. It’s not the author’s fault who did a great job writing the book, I just tend to overthink things sometimes. If only I can switch that part of my brain, I think I’ll be able to enjoy this story more than I have. After everything is said and done, I’m not sure if this book is for everyone, but that’s why if you’re a book lover, you should give this a try before saying nay.
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Top reviews from the United States

  • Reviewed in the United States on October 25, 2017
    A continuous and hilarious romp from the first page to the last. The bad guys are lovable and the good guys are bad in a good sort of way. Between the lines are sublime messages about our human nature, our geopolitical machinations, and the folly of our knack for bad decisions with unexpected results. Chris Milner has a way of story telling that is unique and brilliant with ample supply of sharp wit and humor. I strongly advise not eating or drinking while reading this book. One might guffaw at the wrong moment and ruin a good keyboard or soil a leather couch.
  • Reviewed in the United States on November 22, 2019
    This easy to read but unique book had do silly things like laughing out-loud, suddenly saying “huh?” beside my husband who would in turn be shaking his head like there’s no helping me, but hey, that’s just the kind of book this is.

    A fun read with lovable bad guys and good guys that who can keep up with being bad with the villains. Characters are easy to tell apart by their way of speech alone.

    The downside for me is the knowledge that the book is actually a mixed between fiction and real life event. I’m someone who barely pay attention to news or anything happening around the world unless it’s important for my life, so I started speculating which is real and what is not while reading. It’s not the author’s fault who did a great job writing the book, I just tend to overthink things sometimes. If only I can switch that part of my brain, I think I’ll be able to enjoy this story more than I have.

    After everything is said and done, I’m not sure if this book is for everyone, but that’s why if you’re a book lover, you should give this a try before saying nay.
    Customer image
    5.0 out of 5 stars
    give this a try before saying nay

    Reviewed in the United States on November 22, 2019
    This easy to read but unique book had do silly things like laughing out-loud, suddenly saying “huh?” beside my husband who would in turn be shaking his head like there’s no helping me, but hey, that’s just the kind of book this is.

    A fun read with lovable bad guys and good guys that who can keep up with being bad with the villains. Characters are easy to tell apart by their way of speech alone.

    The downside for me is the knowledge that the book is actually a mixed between fiction and real life event. I’m someone who barely pay attention to news or anything happening around the world unless it’s important for my life, so I started speculating which is real and what is not while reading. It’s not the author’s fault who did a great job writing the book, I just tend to overthink things sometimes. If only I can switch that part of my brain, I think I’ll be able to enjoy this story more than I have.

    After everything is said and done, I’m not sure if this book is for everyone, but that’s why if you’re a book lover, you should give this a try before saying nay.
    Images in this review
    Customer image
  • Reviewed in the United States on October 19, 2017
    A really good read, it is a witty and humourous story. I follow Chris's blog and I always laugh reading his stories. He has the kind of humor that stays with you, you remember his jokes and names of characters. Sometimes he reminds me of Mark Twain with his subtle and funny sarcasm that is also meaningful and memorable.
  • Reviewed in the United States on October 22, 2017
    A rousing adventure story made credible by the sheer force of its characters' personalities and the sharply realized details of their funny wits. Imaginative ... dazzling, colorgul and utterly compelling. Splendid fun and has its magnetic appeal. Christopher Milner's is the best!