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Beyond Erections: Sexual pleasure and intimacy with erectile differences Paperback – April 5, 2025
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Beyond Erections speaks directly to people with penises that either remain soft or seldom get fully hard. It’s also intended for their partners of any gender or sexual orientation, and for those whose sexual pleasures are mostly or all solo. It may offer some new ideas to people who do have hard erections, too.
"Marvelous and long overdue! I am honored to endorse Beyond Erections" - Dr Lorraine Becker (MD), Family Doctor and Fellow of European Committee of Sexual Medicine
Mish Middelmann writes from closely observed experience and with the active support of his wife. As a couple they have engaged with erectile differences since his prostate cancer surgery in 2020.
The book has been shaped by Mish’s candid, in-depth conversations with over 200 men and their partners over the course of five years, within and beyond the community that has grown around his RecoveringMan.net website and support group. To enable these difficult conversations he draws on 18 years of experience as an internationally certified leadership and relationship systems coach.
- Print length114 pages
- LanguageEnglish
- Publication dateApril 5, 2025
- Dimensions6 x 0.29 x 9 inches
- ISBN-101069276022
- ISBN-13978-1069276025
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Editorial Reviews
Review
Previously, I would typically have told these patients to accept the situation as gracefully as possible. Now though - after reading Beyond Erections - I tell them about 'outercourse', and recommend that they read this invaluable book by Mish Middelmann.
This extremely well researched, comprehensive, sensitive and sympathetic guide will help you firstly to understand loss and change - and then introduce you to a plethora of possibilities of pleasure.
No need to resort to getting lost in the overwhelming and often confusing landscape of the internet or AI. It is all here - the research has been done for you. And if you want to learn more, there is also an excellent referrences and resources section.
Don't "hang up your gloves" until you have read this book.
— Dr JD Potgieter, urologist.
Product details
- Publisher : Waves Press
- Publication date : April 5, 2025
- Language : English
- Print length : 114 pages
- ISBN-10 : 1069276022
- ISBN-13 : 978-1069276025
- Item Weight : 5.7 ounces
- Dimensions : 6 x 0.29 x 9 inches
- Best Sellers Rank: #686,967 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #85 in Male Impotence
- #791 in General Sexual Health
- #1,663 in Sex & Sexuality
About the author

Until 2020, Mish circled the globe, consulting and coaching in large organizations grappling with complex change in Africa, Asia, Europe and North America. Before he became a coach in 2007, he co-founded and was first CEO of a software and services company in Johannesburg, South Africa. Prior to that he taught A level Physics in Harare, Zimbabwe in the 1980s. He was born in Cape Town as a privileged white man under the apartheid system.
Since his radical prostatectomy because of prostate cancer in February 2020, Mish has continued working worldwide as a coach, consultant and trainer of organizational and relationship coaches. With an eye to health he has set a less demanding schedule and devoted more time to healing. Soon after the operation, Mish began blogging his experiences on the Recovering Man website and drew in others to tell their stories. He set up and has facilitated monthly live online support groups since 2020 with men around the world who have been diagnosed with prostate cancer and the resulting impact on their quality of life.
His explorations have led to his participation in a variety of public conversations and podcasts. Mish was given the Ron Hering Mission of Service Award in 2021, awarded to men involved in the Mankind Project who excel in missions of service to the wider community, for his work on the Recovering Man support groups and website.
He and his life partner Colleen have two adult sons, whom they followed to North America in 2023. Mish and Colleen now live near the shore of Lake Ontario in Toronto.
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