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Better Man, Better Marriage: Awaken Your Inner Hero and Move from Passive to Powerful in Your Most Important Relationship Paperback – September 3, 2022

by Jeff Borkoski (Author)

391 ratings

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REIGNITE INTIMACY. LOVE THE MAN YOU BECOME.

Most men have a marriage that can only be described as "meh." So-so. Not boo-yah, not train wreck, just "meh." Stuck in the mediocre middle.

Or maybe your wife is shut down. Guarded. Distant. Dismissive. Sex is a distant memory. And here's the pulling-your-hair-out part: Nothing you do makes it any better, only worse. It's depressing. It's infuriating. You desperately want to repair your marriage but don't know how.

But what if ...

What if this is your line-in-the-sand moment? Your opportunity to grow and evolve and become the hero your family is crossing its fingers for — a bigger, bolder, more present, powerful, loving, kind, tenacious, eye-of-the-tiger YOU.

In this little powerhouse, you'll learn ...

How to build a marriage that's warm, fun, close, and intimate (without becoming a pleaser or Nice Guy)
How to respond when your wife hurls a criticism or complaint (without getting defensive)
How to tap into your masculine energy stores. (They might be buried beneath years of neglect, but like the ring of power in Tolkien's tales of Middle Earth, your masculinity wants to be found. It's trying to get back to its master.)
How to avoid the devastation, emotional trauma, and financial bloodbath of divorce
How to respond when your wife says, "I love you, but I'm not in love with you."

Welcome to the revolution!

"I see why women rave over it. It turns complicated truths into simple ones. Women, buy this book. Give it to the men you care about. For your sake and theirs." -Amber (Amazon Customer)

"I have a new perspective on what it means to be a real man." -Clint (Amazon Customer)

"Read it in one sitting and I'm the wife. The author hits every single nail on the head. It's absolutely uncanny. Life and marriage-changing!" -Jennifer (Amazon Customer)

"My wife moved out four months ago. Today, she suggested we put divorce on hold. None of this would have happened without this book." -Jason (Amazon Customer)

"Jeff has a rather uncanny understanding and articulation of the female psyche. If one man can understand so fully what a woman wants, maybe mine can, too! I recommend it for both men and women." -TSW (Amazon Customer)

"Invaluable for any man wanting to rebuild trust and connection in his marriage. I wish I'd read it 20 years ago!" -Mark (Amazon Customer)

"The author doesn't put women down but invites men to step up. This book would have saved my marriage from the damage I caused by telling my husband how to be a husband." -Cherie (Amazon Customer)

"The most practical book I've ever read on how to be a better man! I bought one for each of my grown sons." -Jeff (Amazon Customer)

"This book should be a prerequisite for marriage." -Jason (Amazon Customer)

"How does the author know what my wife was thinking and how she'd respond?! I was oblivious before I found this book." -Steve (Amazon Customer)

"You'll swear Jeff has been watching you cruise through life on Autopilot — neglecting your wife and setting yourself up for failure. WAKE UP NOW and buy this book before you spend way more on a lawyer and alimony!" -Kris (Amazon Customer)

"If you're reading this, you're already on the right path. Buy this amazing book. Save your marriage. I waited too long. Grow and evolve NOW before it's too late." -III (Amazon Customer)

REIGNITE INTIMACY. ORDER NOW.

From the Publisher

Down to earth, practical, shocking for its honesty

The kick in the butt we need to step up and be better men

Editorial Reviews

Review

"Gentlemen, here's your whiteboard. Your X's and O's. All the stuff we were never taught about romantic relationships. I read it in one sitting. It's that good." -Bill Lewit, Hall of Fame Basketball Coach

"Straight and to the point. The kick in the butt we need to step up and be better men." -JT Zahradnik, Host of Dad Talks Podcast

"Seriously?! HOW DOES HE KNOW THIS?! Jeff takes the deep, complicated inner workings of the female psyche and plainly spells them out for his tribe. And though it's geared toward men, I'm the one inspired to be a better woman and wife!" -Bridget Depew, Editor

"Don't roll the dice in your most important relationship! Jeff spells out exactly what a woman needs most from her husband. Here at 24/7, it's our go-to guide to prepare men for marriage. Every husband and husband-to-be needs to read this transformative book." -Javier Labrador, CEO of 24/7 Marriage

"As a therapist and wife, I've read countless counseling books. I like this one the best. It made me feel, it made me cry, it made me laugh. And it's helped my husband find his way." -Cristina, Amazon Customer (Germany)

"This book is a gut punch. And I mean that in the best possible way. Jeff strikes a blow to the passive behavior that keeps our marriages mediocre but with humor and an easy-to-digest 'been there, done that' delivery. If playing small is no longer an option, you've found your field manual." -Carl Thomas, CEO of Live Free

"Down to earth, practical, and shocking at times for its honesty. It has me peering under the hood of my own marriage and looking for ways to improve." -Dave Stradling, author of Learning to Float: My Conversations with Rob Bell

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Jeff Borkoski
Publication date ‏ : ‎ September 3, 2022
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Print length ‏ : ‎ 175 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 099765614X
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0997656145
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 1 pounds
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.25 x 0.44 x 8 inches

Best Sellers Rank: #29,905 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #4 in Family Health (Books)
- #33 in Divorce (Books)
- #57 in Dating (Books)

Customer Reviews:
391 ratings

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Jeff Borkoski

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Jeff helps husbands avoid the devastation, emotional trauma, and financial bloodbath known as divorce — teaching them how to build strong and sexy marriages instead. He’s the author of two books, creator of “How to Win Your Wife Back,” a marriage crisis coach, and monthly contributor at Live Free.

Jeff is also a dad, outdoor enthusiast, biohacker, soon-to-be sexagenarian, and raving fan of all things kombucha. When he’s not oversharing on Facebook, you can find him in the mountains, the ocean, or Whole Foods.

Customer reviews

391 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book practical and filled with tons of guidance, helping them understand the why and how of their relationships. Moreover, the book is easy to read, with relatable examples and short chapters that make it a quick read. Additionally, customers appreciate how it helps husbands become better men and permanently improve their marriages, while providing a much-needed call to action. They also value the book's authenticity, with one customer noting it's "legit as they come."

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Advice level Marriage improvement Readability Story length Actionable Authenticity Growth

83 customers mention "Advice level"83 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's practical guidance, with one customer noting how it helps understand the "why and how" of relationships.

"...I plan to read this book several times because it is helpful, informative, easy to read and it just makes sense...." Read more

"This book is very eye opening and teaches you things that you didn’t think you needed to know...." Read more

"...Husbands, if you are having any marital problems - this book is an eye opener. It gut punched me into being a better man. Jeff is a marital genius...." Read more

"This book is very insightful, informative and relatable...." Read more

50 customers mention "Marriage improvement"50 positive0 negative

Customers find the book effective for permanently improving marriages and becoming a better man, with one customer noting it helps husbands become more intentional.

"Better Man Better Marriage is a guide for men to become more intentional and present husbands...." Read more

"...It’s an easy read; authentic and motivating. I see a community of newly formed husbands as a result of this exceptional book…" Read more

"This is a book that every man should read. This book should also be part of the curriculum for young men in their senior year of high school...." Read more

"This book has really impacted my marriage! Strongly recommend." Read more

46 customers mention "Readability"46 positive0 negative

Customers find the book easy to read and suitable for every man, with one customer noting how the author hits every nail on the head, while another mentions it serves as a guide for men to become more intentional.

"...to read this book several times because it is helpful, informative, easy to read and it just makes sense...." Read more

"...It’s an easy read; authentic and motivating. I see a community of newly formed husbands as a result of this exceptional book…" Read more

"What an excellent bit of information! Easy read and very applicable...." Read more

"If you feel as if your marriage is failing, give this book a read. Easy to read a comical!" Read more

14 customers mention "Story length"14 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's short chapters and relatable examples, with one customer highlighting its raw and honest retelling of a failed marriage.

"...The tips are practical, the writing poignant, and the examples extremely relatable...." Read more

"The book is easy to read and digest with so many real world examples that hit home...." Read more

"...Jeff has a way of writing that is not boring, shares real life stories about him and others in this book that made it easy for me to relate too...." Read more

"This book isn't too long, and it isn't overly wordy or hard to digest...." Read more

5 customers mention "Actionable"5 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's call to action, with one mentioning its focus on taking consistent action.

"...It showed me that being a good man in a marriage means taking consistent action, reflecting deeply on your behavior, and learning to truly feel what..." Read more

"...This book is an easy read, and a much needed call for action. Definitely an incredible addition to anyone’s personal library." Read more

"...I guarantee you can pull some incredibly valuable and actionable concepts from this book...." Read more

"...Full of great advice and Jeff is responsive if you need additional insight." Read more

4 customers mention "Authenticity"4 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the authenticity of the book.

"I met the author personally and he is as legit as they come. I recommend this book to any man wanting to save their marriage." Read more

"All true. Should be required reading. 20 years married, working on next 20. This is the playbook." Read more

"...It’s an easy read; authentic and motivating. I see a community of newly formed husbands as a result of this exceptional book…" Read more

"Not just for him. Wives - hope, validation, and sanity can be found here..." Read more

4 customers mention "Growth"4 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's focus on personal growth, with one mentioning how it helps readers evolve as individuals.

"...I highly recommend. Growth moments." Read more

"...Keep growing. Keep evolving." Read more

"...in the hope that we would learn from his experiences and grow as individuals...." Read more

"This book gives a crystal clear path for self-reflection and growth. Learning how to be your best self leads to becoming the best husband...." Read more

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Top reviews from the United States

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Edward Raus
Helped me understand her distance — and rebuild myself.
Reviewed in the United States on May 13, 2025
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

I picked this book up in the middle of a separation I didn’t want, completely confused about how we got there. She felt cold, shut down, and distant — and no matter what I did or said, it seemed to push her further away. I was desperate for answers, stuck between trying to save us and feeling like I was losing myself.

What this book did was shift the focus back to me — not in a selfish way, but in a real way. It helped me understand how I’d shown up over the years, where I’d gone passive without even realizing it, and how that passivity slowly chips away at trust, attraction, and connection.

But more than anything, it helped me understand her. Why she might feel guarded. Why she pulled away. What she needed that I hadn’t been giving — not surface-level stuff, but presence, grounded energy, leadership. The things I thought I was doing by “trying harder” but was really missing by avoiding the hard work inside.

This book doesn’t give you lines to say or tricks to get your wife back. It gives you a mirror. And for me, that mirror came at the exact right time.

If you’re lost, confused, or in pain — especially if you’re still holding on to hope — read this. Then read it again. And be willing to change. Not for her… for the man you’re meant to be.

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6 people found this helpful

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EAD
The book that is saving my life!
Reviewed in the United States on May 15, 2025
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
This is a book that every man should read. This book should also be part of the curriculum for young men in their senior year of high school. I will say this again, EVERY man no matter how good you think you are or how good you think your marriage is, SHOULD READ THIS BOOK. This book punched me in the face and made me realize how little I knew about marriage and women. For a guy like me who thinks, (thought) he knew everything, it was and continues to be humbling. I will be buying more copies and giving them to my friends, so they do not have to wait as long as I did to pull their head out of the sand. Thank you JEFF!

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2 people found this helpful

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Amazon Customer
Buy this book to evolve as a man
Reviewed in the United States on June 18, 2025
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
I haven’t finished the book as of yet, but wow. This has already instilled a level of accountability in me that I didn’t know was possible. The simplicity of the book and how relatable it is to my current life, is unreal. I highly recommend. Growth moments.

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R.H.
Hits the Mark
Reviewed in the United States on July 9, 2025
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
This book has really impacted my marriage! Strongly recommend.

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Susan A Johnson
Eye opener for those that have been slacking in relationships.
Reviewed in the United States on June 9, 2025
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
This is a must read. Bought it for my husband and I to read, in hopes it would make a difference for improving our 25-yr relationship. It was an eye opener for sure. It provides valuable insights into various aspects of relationships and personal growth, which has benefited the both of us. I am so grateful I took the chance on buying this book.

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One person found this helpful

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The Rebecca Review
One Husband's Guide to Knowing How to Create a Strong and Sexy Marriage!
Reviewed in the United States on August 14, 2024
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
In my search for the perfect book to recommend to a married man I have found very few I could review, let alone give as a gift. As a woman reading page six I had tears streaming down my face. Finally a guy who understands women and the heart of what is going on in most marriages that are lacking in emotional intimacy and sex. If you keep telling your wife to be quiet instead of talking to her, this book can explain why this is deadly to your marriage.

By page 17 I was laughing and by page 33 I was literally saying to myself: "This is the most important book a husband will ever read!" When the author talks about men becoming a man worth following that spoke deeply to my feminine soul. That is what I want to admire in my husband and when he does what this book says to do I respect him more.

Women reading this book will feel like finally women have been figured out. Most marriage books have solutions to minor and major problems, but this book goes to the core of a woman's heart and psychology and teaches you how to gain her ultimate love. This book is probably saving a lot of marriages and it is a book I've started gifting to people who are wonderful individuals but are struggling in their marriages.

A man who acts like this book suggests sounds like a dream. Make your wife's fantasy man her reality! I'd put this in the top ten marriage books I've ever read and I've read over 150 relationship advice books. For men, this may be the number one book I'd recommend for a happier marriage. If there are things you want, you can get them! All the power is in the words you say to your wife. She has been waiting to hear them!

~The Rebecca Review

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5 people found this helpful

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miles hill
Achieve Your Marriage Potential
Reviewed in the United States on June 12, 2025
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
If you want to be a better husband and a better man, buy this book and do the work. Get a journal, take notes, complete the action items, and put them into practice. Your marriage will improve, and so will your life. Stop wasting time.

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Bryce W.
Save your marriage! Must read!
Reviewed in the United States on April 22, 2025
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
I believe Jeff wrote this book about me. It has been eye-opening and made me realize how many mistakes I was making every day with the only woman I have ever truly loved. I plan to read this book several times because it is helpful, informative, easy to read and it just makes sense. I have always been a very good communicator in business but not in relationships and this book will absolutely help me become a Better Man and a Better Husband. My wife deserves that and so do I. I texted Jeff, got a very quick response and spoke to him the next day. I also plan to join his group sessions. From what I have read and seen, Jeff has the ultimate road map to helping me become the best version of myself as a man and as a husband. This book was just the beginning.

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One person found this helpful

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Top reviews from other countries

Shaun S.
Extremely helpful
Reviewed in Canada on April 23, 2025
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

If you’re struggling in your relationship, separated, facing divorce, or just need a nudge in the right direction, this book has it all. Read the book, join the online community, get started today!

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Amazon-Kunde
Game changer
Reviewed in Germany on May 25, 2024
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
For those of you with little time:
Jeff's book is a game changer.

You wanna understand what being a good husband looks like? Read this book. You will understand then.

For those of you with more time:
Are you desperate? Search no more.
As a therapist and wife myself, I have read countless counselling books. I like Jeff's book the best.
As a husband you will understand what you have been doing wrong. You will understand why your wife is not responding the way you expect her to.
As a wife you will understand why you are feeling so frustrated, so resentful.

Jeff's writing style is smooth and witty, an easy read, but it does hold a punch. It made me feel, it made me cry, it made me laugh.
And I think it has helped my husband find his way.

This book is worth your time. Read it once. Read it a thousand times.

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Charlie
Does what it says, creates better man & better marriage
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on June 20, 2025
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
The world needs this. Men need this. Tips to turn your life and your marriage around. Like a cold shower or slap in the face. It stings, but it really helps

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David W.
i LOVE this book
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 29, 2024
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
This Book is changing me, i bought this book as my marriage was not in a good place and in desperation i took to trying to find books on becoming a better husband, i picked this book on a whim but i am so glad i did.

I bought this book in the hopes it would help me understand my wife better and become a better husband, what i didn't expect is that it would make me completely overhaul myself as a Man not just as a husband, i have made so many changes all for the better .

I enjoyed the book so much Ive since Joined Jeffs online course and community, even if this does not save my marriage its making me a way way better person going forwards.

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Mr. S.
What a great book
Reviewed in Canada on May 13, 2025
Format: KindleVerified Purchase
I have read a lot of marriage books, and this book really summarizes so many key points that need to be addressed. How to be successful in marriage as a husband is not taught in school, and I will keep using this book as my reference guide going forward. I even joined Jeff's online community, which I find to be a great place to belong. I highly recommend Jeff's book to anyone out there looking to better themselves and their marriage.

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Better Man, Better Marriage: Awaken Your Inner Hero and Move from Passive to Powerful in Your Most Important Relationship Paperback – September 3, 2022

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Top reviews from other countries

5.0 out of 5 stars Extremely helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Game changer

5.0 out of 5 stars Does what it says, creates better man & better marriage

5.0 out of 5 stars i LOVE this book

5.0 out of 5 stars What a great book

Extremely helpful

Game changer

Does what it says, creates better man & better marriage

i LOVE this book

What a great book