Eventually, everything will be made of cloth...

WIFE: "I was flipping our natural latex mattress today with the help of our 4th and 7th children and do you know what I found?"

YOU: "It's not what you think, those aren't mine!"

WIFE: "We talked about this, Charmin isn't something we use in this house."

YOU: (head down in shame) "Just don't tell anyone about this OK? I have a problem..."

WIFE: "Well I already posted a photo on Facebook but they let you take those down."

YOU: (mumbled) "No they don't..."

WIFE: "What?"

YOU: "Terms of service agreement..."

WIFE: "What?"

YOU: "I love you."

--

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